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My first Mr. Beer brew was the Octoberfest Vienna Lager, which at that time I was doing it in the dorms. Leaving a window cracked open I was able to keep the room about 40dF and everything looked good. Since I didn't have any glass bottles or a capper at that time I used plastic pop bottles. Great thing is that beer was bottled, worst thing was that there was a pronounced soapy flavor. On the up side, the soap had a citrusy flavor.

Overall though, it was barely drinkable and I quickly learned how important it is to clean properly and don't half arse everything...
 
I've had good luck with homebrewing so far, but recently installed a professional direct draw 5-keg fridge at my friend's bar. I've never used a keg before in my life, but I read a lot before hand. I get all the lines cut and run, everything seems to be hooked up perfectly. I'm knelt down in front of the middle of the fridge, reach in, twist on the coupler. I check everything 10 more times, but I'm still terrified something is going to explode. Moment of truth: I pull the lever down to engage the keg... and nothing spills! Only one more step... threw the valve open on the CO2 regulator, and instantly get a freaking Bell's Two-Hearted beer shower all over my head. I left the damned tap handle open!!
 
GodsStepBrother said:
A little while ago I acquired 2 sanke kegs, and due to the excitement i took an early lunch went home and decided i would open them and start the oxi soak. They had been laying around for years one was about half way full of beer. I ended up getting the smart idea of pushing the ball lock in to de-pressurize it. Rotten stinky beer spews out under pressure and lands right on my face and body, I instantly start vomiting.

Sadly this idiotic story is not over. I stop vomiting and decide to hose off a bit and give it another go. This time I get a long bar and think if I push the ball lock again from a bit of a distance I will be fine. So I proceed to do this, and yet again get sprayed with rotten beer, and proceed to vomit again. I clean up again and realize I can stick a steel bar in the ground flip the keg over and take all the beer out in a separate direction. I ended up taking a shower again during my lunch.

sad stuff indeed.
Click to expand...

EPIC!!! I would have paid good money to see this in action.
 
My worst issue was when I had a full bottling buckets on the floor and had to run into the other room for a second. I came back to my dog head deep in the bucket sucking down Irish Red for all he was worth. I got him outside only to come back and see the OTHER dog with her head in the bucket sucking down my sweet sweet brew. Needless to say I bottle with the dogs in their cages now.

On a side note, watching my dogs stumble around drunk was pretty hilarious.
 
I just bottled an IPA. When it was towards the end of the boil just after the last hop addition I thought I hope all these hops don't plug the stainless braids on the keggle. Next thought OH! NO! forgot to put braid in.
 
"LOL" always bugged me. I mean are you really laughing out loud? I don't use that crap...

But -
GodsStepBrother said:
A little while ago I acquired 2 sanke kegs, and due to the excitement i took an early lunch went home and decided i would open them and start the oxi soak. They had been laying around for years one was about half way full of beer. I ended up getting the smart idea of pushing the ball lock in to de-pressurize it. Rotten stinky beer spews out under pressure and lands right on my face and body, I instantly start vomiting.

Sadly this idiotic story is not over. I stop vomiting and decide to hose off a bit and give it another go. This time I get a long bar and think if I push the ball lock again from a bit of a distance I will be fine. So I proceed to do this, and yet again get sprayed with rotten beer, and proceed to vomit again. I clean up again and realize I can stick a steel bar in the ground flip the keg over and take all the beer out in a separate direction. I ended up taking a shower again during my lunch.

sad stuff indeed.
Click to expand...

LMFAO.
 
Sitting at work hungover today, this thread made my day!! I can't really contribute yet as I haven't brewed enough to make any epic mistakes. But, I'm sure I'll be sharing one day.
 
I shot iodine onto my ceiling...luckily missing my eyes in the process. The bottle was kind of sticky, and I couldn't get any iodine out. I squeezed and squeezed, and BOOM...My white ceiling is now iodine colored right above my sink. SWMBO didn't recognize it, but her mom did when she was in town last time.

That's a fun one to explain......"Yea, we were drinking while making beer a few months ago, and it was probably about midnight because we were just sanitizing the fermenter towards the end of the brewing process..." ... yeaaa...
 
My last brew day, as I was doughing in, I realized I forgot to attach my stainless braid to the bulkhead. Easily the dumbest thing ive done yet, and I hadn't even had a homebrew!

Ended up attaching the braid to the boil kettle, picking up and dumping the MT into the BK (10 gallon batch), washing the MT, using the MT as a BK. Floors are nicely sticky now.

WON'T BE DOING THAT AGAIN.
 

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