I like this time at night on HBT

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If you really want your kids to have someone to play with ("The Goal"), you'll swallow your pride, stay calm, and ask the guy why he made this decision. If possible, make him understand his fears were unfounded.

99% chance he's a super-a-hole. But in order for you to accomplish The Goal, you have to eat it. That means nodding agreeably, not counterattacking, not making your own point at all. If you can do that, maybe your kids win. If you can't, they lose, but you'll feel better. So, it's probably up to you. Without exception, level heads prevail.

If you eat it, you should know that a-holes do get their comeuppance. Life is hard for the a-hole. You don't have to teach him that, he's already living it.

sfgoat said:
Just reaching out to the masses here but I was hoping to get some opinions from you all. My two sons just told my wife today that they were told by the neighbor across the street's dad that they are not allowed to play with his kids anymore. So my wife, taking the boy's story (they said they didn't know why) with a grain of salt, decided to go and talk to him. Keep in mind they only moved in a few months ago and neither of us is very social so we have never really been introduced but the kids are only ever allowed to play in their front yard where we can supervise from just about anywhere outside or through any window in our house. So she knocked on the door and the dad answers so she introduces herself and lets the guy know who her kids are. After this he quickly responded with, "Oh so they DO have parents! I just assumed you didn't exist." After this she bit her tongue which is a lot calmer than I would have been considering we live not even 100 ft away but he wouldn't give her any specifics on what prompted this sudden decision.

This is really eating at me because they are the only kids in the neighborhood currently so now my kids have no one else to play with unless we set up play dates with our friends and their kids which is surprisingly hard to do.

What am I to do? Do I go and talk to him now and let him know that he offended my wife with his jack assery or do I just leave it and just tell my kids to stay away? What would you guys do?
Click to expand...
 
Something Wong . Maybe my anger. Your neighbor sounds insecure, maybe his wife is and any man that is married to an insecure wife knows how tough she can make life, therefor his actions. Maybe the guy is just a true jerk.

I'd keep the kids clear of the neighbor's place until all is settled. Sounds like him and his wife might be confrontational, or super protective of their kids. Maybe he's in the witness protection program

No matter what, sounds like the kids are going to have to wait. Adults need get along first, though sometimes kids remind us of that.

My pennies [emoji3]
 
It may not hurt to talk with your kids to find out more of what may have caused the banishment to start. Then if things still seem weird I would stop by, offer him a goodwill/introductory/nicetameetcha beer and just make your own impressions of the guy. He may have issues, something may have gone on that their kids blamed on yours, etc. Sounds like he is kinda a jerk but since you have only been there a couple months, it never hurts to make nice with the neighbors. Having a nice discussion with the guy and offering and reinforcing that if there really is a problem with your kids to please let you know because you are approachable and not dirt bags really can help neighborly relations. Who knows? Your pimp kid may have been caught playing doctor with his daughter.
 
The neighbors may be feeling that you are dumping you kids on them if they play at the he neighbors house more often than at your house. In that light the comment neighbor dad made makes sense. Fixing it means arranging playdates at your house with those neighbor kids. Also some parents don't consider 'visible through a random window' to be effective adult supervision. Some folks require more active parenting. Good luck!
 
So we have never seen the parents before my wife went over. I still have never seen either of them. My wife says that the dad was very much a "diva" . I have invited his kids to play in our yard several times as my boys have a clubhouse and a nice playset but I guess they aren't allowed to leave their yard but for a minute when they come to ask my kids to play. I'm just going to take PP's advice and let it be. My kids can still invite school friends over and all this guy has done is alienated his own children.

I realize to him I may seem like I'm not giving enough supervision but I refuse to be a helicopter parent. I am still supervising my kids, the just don't realize I am always watching. Kids need some freedom to develop on their own.

All this said they moved into the neighborhood about 5 months ago and I still have never seen the parents so I doubt that will increase any of I just let things be.
 
I'll preface tell you straight. I'm drunk. I don't for more than a moment believe my current state reflects the norm on ,HBT or this thread,,,, just me this Saturday night

Cheers to you all

Dan
 
Dan said:
I'll preface tell you straight. I'm drunk. I don't for more than a moment believe my current state reflects the norm on ,HBT or this thread,,,, just me this Saturday night

Cheers to you all

Dan
Click to expand...

It happens to the best of us man. I hope you are well today. I have a good buzz on. I have to get up too early for that but what the hell. The world will still spin round.
 
gillsrob said:
Good evening folks it's been a while eh? Like a year or more...
Click to expand...

How's it going? Hunting?

Hope the late nite crew is doing well. Seems there's less of us now. That's good, early to bed and early to rise is a good plan.

My wife's out of town this week, so I've been burning nag champa in the house. In heaven. She hates it. I think it reminds her of her naughty past. :) For me, what's past is prologue. :) :)

For your late nite soundrack, John Lennon. Nothing's gonna change my world. Peace!

[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNdRU-5tMfg[/ame]
 
All

Question

4500 watt hot water heater element

240 vac input

It is only drawing 5.3 amps

Shouldn't it be around upper 18-ish?

Maybe a wiring gauge/ corrosion / bad connection problem or is Ohm wrong?
 
All

Question

4500 watt hot water heater element

240 vac input

It is only drawing 5.3 amps

Shouldn't it be around upper 18-ish?

Maybe a wiring gauge/ corrosion / bad connection problem or is Ohm wrong?

I know nothing about this, but google agrees with you. This is from a discuss on on breaker size:

18.75
4,500W/240V = 18.75 x 1.5 = 28A ( next size up rule per 422.11(E) ) 30A breaker is the proper size.
 
Dan said:
All

Question

4500 watt hot water heater element

240 vac input

It is only drawing 5.3 amps

Shouldn't it be around upper 18-ish?

Maybe a wiring gauge/ corrosion / bad connection problem or is Ohm wrong?
Click to expand...

Come on, Dan. Ask TR. They know everything.

Cheers, late nighters. Though it's not that late here.
 
flars said:
My foreign language skills are lacking. What is the beer talk about from all the new people?
Click to expand...

I think they're giving us the recipe for the best beer ever. To bad I learned Spanish in school. I thought they had the spam bots under control now...
 
LabRatBrewer said:
All







I know nothing about this, but google agrees with you. This is from a discuss on on breaker size:



18.75

4,500W/240V = 18.75 x 1.5 = 28A ( next size up rule per 422.11(E) ) 30A breaker is the proper size.
Click to expand...


Thanks Albert!
We came across a water heater under wired....not like the bra. I rewired with a heavier gauge wire (alas it was not an electric brew pot ). Current flow went from low fives up to 17ish. 12 gauge copper wire. Still didn't completely fix the hot water problem, it's solar assisted as well and a cold water mix valve had been plumbed wrong. I'm parroting the plumbing problem because I don't get it all yet.

I'm still learning about solar assisted water heaters
 
Good morning mainland friends. It's 0548 and I'm on the porcelain throne. Just finished breakfast and running late. Gonna spend the next hour and a half in traffic going 20 miles. Yeh paradise.
 
Dan said:
Good morning mainland friends. It's 0548 and I'm on the porcelain throne. Just finished breakfast and running late. Gonna spend the next hour and a half in traffic going 20 miles. Yeh paradise.
Click to expand...


You're a depressing arse. I can quote my own stupidity. No?
 

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The staff was a piece of rainbow eucalyptus my wife collected from fallen branches last summer. I put some poly on it. Really a beautiful piece of wood don't know what I'll do with it now
 
I'm writing this during the day time, but I was really touched at what my son wrote about the passing of my father this week and wanted to share:

https://www.facebook.com/tevacek/posts/10101076213826293

"Today we laid to rest my grandpa, John T. Rogers. He was technically my “step” grandpa and the only reason why that is important is because he treated me better than most grandpas treat their grandsons. That is why he was simply my grandpa. I have been reflecting about him over the last few days and the lessons and things he has taught me. I came up with three short stories.
1. He was my first employer. I mowed his lawn for years over the hot Nebraska summers. I really enjoyed the time I spent with him in the garage with his loads of tools prepping the mower for use. He always had a few old Toros (most of them older than me) that seemed to work well and get the job done. If something broke down he seemed to have a way to fix it. It was amazing to watch him work and tinker with motors. I did not find out until recently how significant his position in leadership was at Western Electric and then AT&T. He was a great first boss and he paid me well for the work I did even though I would have done the work for free.
2. One weekend my grandparents found a really amazing deal on bulk Legos. When I say bulk, I mean over 2 large trashcans full. They ended up devoting an entire room in their house as the Lego room. As a kid I would spend hours in that room creating armies and cities. He also had a nice arrangement of slot cars and trains that kept me busy. I attribute a lot of my curiosity, wanting to learn, and ability to troubleshoot to those days I spent at his house and with him.
3.He taught me about purchasing vehicles. I took him and my step dad with me to negotiate on my first three cars. One thing I noticed about him was that he always bought used cars even though I knew he could afford a nice new car. Walking into the showroom I had the thought that this sales person did not even have a chance. I listened to how he negotiated and the tactics he used. He was never mean or aggressive but was able to take control of the situation and found a way to get the price he wanted. The first two times he and my step dad did most of the talking and negotiating. The third time we went to go negotiate on a car he sat back and wanted me to do the talking. Between rounds with the salesperson he would whisper advice into my ear. We ended up walking out with the keys that day and I remember him saying “I think you got a good deal”. He was a good teacher and I could always tell he was proud of me.
When I first moved into my own house he gave me one of those old Toros. It ran well for years until it finally gave out. I told him about it and he said that he had another one for me. (I am fairly certain he had another 2-3). I knew he liked me and treated me fairly because he gave me mowers that worked while my step dad was given snow blowers that never seemed work. I think the Toro I have in my garage is the same one I used to mow his lawn and it still runs like a champ.
I want to leave everyone with this. The Lord used the death of Jesus to bring life and hope. I am confident that the God can use any situation, including the death of my grandpa to bring life."

My wife and I would love to take all the credit for instilling in my son these incredible values, but as you can see he had a number of important influences to help guide him. :rockin:
 
opus345 said:
I'm writing this during the day time, but I was really touched at what my son wrote about the passing of my father this week and wanted to share:



https://www.facebook.com/tevacek/posts/10101076213826293



"Today we laid to rest my grandpa, John T. Rogers. He was technically my “step” grandpa and the only reason why that is important is because he treated me better than most grandpas treat their grandsons. That is why he was simply my grandpa. I have been reflecting about him over the last few days and the lessons and things he has taught me. I came up with three short stories.

1. He was my first employer. I mowed his lawn for years over the hot Nebraska summers. I really enjoyed the time I spent with him in the garage with his loads of tools prepping the mower for use. He always had a few old Toros (most of them older than me) that seemed to work well and get the job done. If something broke down he seemed to have a way to fix it. It was amazing to watch him work and tinker with motors. I did not find out until recently how significant his position in leadership was at Western Electric and then AT&T. He was a great first boss and he paid me well for the work I did even though I would have done the work for free.

2. One weekend my grandparents found a really amazing deal on bulk Legos. When I say bulk, I mean over 2 large trashcans full. They ended up devoting an entire room in their house as the Lego room. As a kid I would spend hours in that room creating armies and cities. He also had a nice arrangement of slot cars and trains that kept me busy. I attribute a lot of my curiosity, wanting to learn, and ability to troubleshoot to those days I spent at his house and with him.

3.He taught me about purchasing vehicles. I took him and my step dad with me to negotiate on my first three cars. One thing I noticed about him was that he always bought used cars even though I knew he could afford a nice new car. Walking into the showroom I had the thought that this sales person did not even have a chance. I listened to how he negotiated and the tactics he used. He was never mean or aggressive but was able to take control of the situation and found a way to get the price he wanted. The first two times he and my step dad did most of the talking and negotiating. The third time we went to go negotiate on a car he sat back and wanted me to do the talking. Between rounds with the salesperson he would whisper advice into my ear. We ended up walking out with the keys that day and I remember him saying “I think you got a good deal”. He was a good teacher and I could always tell he was proud of me.

When I first moved into my own house he gave me one of those old Toros. It ran well for years until it finally gave out. I told him about it and he said that he had another one for me. (I am fairly certain he had another 2-3). I knew he liked me and treated me fairly because he gave me mowers that worked while my step dad was given snow blowers that never seemed work. I think the Toro I have in my garage is the same one I used to mow his lawn and it still runs like a champ.

I want to leave everyone with this. The Lord used the death of Jesus to bring life and hope. I am confident that the God can use any situation, including the death of my grandpa to bring life."



My wife and I would love to take all the credit for instilling in my son these incredible values, but as you can see he had a number of important influences in help guide him. :rockin:
Click to expand...


Opus, My condolences for the loss of your father. Never is there a good time, or age to lose a loved one. But sounds as though you haven't lost him at all because everyday you feel him in your heart and see him in your son.

Cheers my friend
Dan
 
Dan said:
All

Question

4500 watt hot water heater element

240 vac input

It is only drawing 5.3 amps

Shouldn't it be around upper 18-ish?

Maybe a wiring gauge/ corrosion / bad connection problem or is Ohm wrong?
Click to expand...

Yep. Maybe lossy wiring, connections, etc. I've measured the AC current through my 5500W elements and they were within 10% of ohms law (I attribute the losses to resistance in house wire, connections, etc).
 
Dan said:
Opus, My condolences for the loss of your father. Never is there a good time, or age to lose a loved one. But sounds as though you haven't lost him at all because everyday you feel him in your heart and see him in your son.

Cheers my friend
Dan
Click to expand...

Dan, I very much appreciate the kinds words and wisdom.

He was 82, had a great life, a loving wife, fantastic kids, great grand kids, and transitioned to the next life peacefully with family at his side. We should all be so blessed.
 
opus345 said:
I'm writing this during the day time, but I was really touched at what my son wrote about the passing of my father this week and wanted to share:

https://www.facebook.com/tevacek/posts/10101076213826293

"Today we laid to rest my grandpa, John T. Rogers. He was technically my “step” grandpa and the only reason why that is important is because he treated me better than most grandpas treat their grandsons. That is why he was simply my grandpa. I have been reflecting about him over the last few days and the lessons and things he has taught me. I came up with three short stories.
1. He was my first employer. I mowed his lawn for years over the hot Nebraska summers. I really enjoyed the time I spent with him in the garage with his loads of tools prepping the mower for use. He always had a few old Toros (most of them older than me) that seemed to work well and get the job done. If something broke down he seemed to have a way to fix it. It was amazing to watch him work and tinker with motors. I did not find out until recently how significant his position in leadership was at Western Electric and then AT&T. He was a great first boss and he paid me well for the work I did even though I would have done the work for free.
2. One weekend my grandparents found a really amazing deal on bulk Legos. When I say bulk, I mean over 2 large trashcans full. They ended up devoting an entire room in their house as the Lego room. As a kid I would spend hours in that room creating armies and cities. He also had a nice arrangement of slot cars and trains that kept me busy. I attribute a lot of my curiosity, wanting to learn, and ability to troubleshoot to those days I spent at his house and with him.
3.He taught me about purchasing vehicles. I took him and my step dad with me to negotiate on my first three cars. One thing I noticed about him was that he always bought used cars even though I knew he could afford a nice new car. Walking into the showroom I had the thought that this sales person did not even have a chance. I listened to how he negotiated and the tactics he used. He was never mean or aggressive but was able to take control of the situation and found a way to get the price he wanted. The first two times he and my step dad did most of the talking and negotiating. The third time we went to go negotiate on a car he sat back and wanted me to do the talking. Between rounds with the salesperson he would whisper advice into my ear. We ended up walking out with the keys that day and I remember him saying “I think you got a good deal”. He was a good teacher and I could always tell he was proud of me.
When I first moved into my own house he gave me one of those old Toros. It ran well for years until it finally gave out. I told him about it and he said that he had another one for me. (I am fairly certain he had another 2-3). I knew he liked me and treated me fairly because he gave me mowers that worked while my step dad was given snow blowers that never seemed work. I think the Toro I have in my garage is the same one I used to mow his lawn and it still runs like a champ.
I want to leave everyone with this. The Lord used the death of Jesus to bring life and hope. I am confident that the God can use any situation, including the death of my grandpa to bring life."

My wife and I would love to take all the credit for instilling in my son these incredible values, but as you can see he had a number of important influences to help guide him. :rockin:
Click to expand...

Wonderful, inspiring stories. Thanks.

When I read stuff like that, I know that we never die if we live right. Long after we're gone, we live on in the ones we taught. As an aging person with no religion, I have no angst whatsoever. Working with my kids is like putting money in the bank.
 
"An agnostic neither believes nor disbelieves in a god or religious doctrine. Agnostics assert that it’s impossible for human beings to know anything about how the universe was created and if divine beings exist.

Agnosticism was coined by biologist T.H. Huxley and comes from the Greek agnostos, which means “unknown or unknowable.”

To complicate matters, atheists and agnostics are often confused with theists and deists.

A theist is the opposite of an atheist. Theists believe in the existence of a god or gods.

(One place where science and spirituality intersect is the concept of the “God Particle.”)

Like a theist, a deist believes in God. But a deist believes that while God created the universe, natural laws determine how the universe plays out.

Deists are often connected to Isaac Newton’s Clockwork Universe theory, where the universe is compared to a clock that has been wound up and set in motion by God but is governed by the laws of science."
 
Hey guys. Good to see you're all still hanging out here and doing well. I keep meaning to log in and see how things are going, but never do. Got married in September. Time has never flown by so fast for me this past year and a half. I have a feeling that's just going to get worse. Anyway, I'd like to incorporate some HBT time back in to my schedule. And some brewing for that matter. :) Hopefully I'll see you around.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
I have another life advice question for you guys.

So my son has had a bully for about 3 years now. The kid is autistic (or so he is labeled) and about 3 times the size of my son. Keeping in mind my son is 7 and the other kid 8. This kid has been in my son's class since kindergarten and there have been more violent altercations between the two of them than I can count. My son has been stabbed with a pencil, punched, kicked, you name it. We today I get a call from the school nurses office and it's my son on the line crying because this kid beat the crap out of him today and he is too scared to go back to class.

So I leave work and get my son and chat with my son's teacher for a minute. Turns out this kid has many violent outbursts daily and my son is not the only target. The teacher is begging me to talk to the principal again (i have many times now, not that it does any good) because she is scared of this kid and so are some of the other teachers. I asked why they don't rally around the victims and demand the child's removal to an alternative school. Apparently they are scared their jobs are on the line if they do. So I got a lot of info about what is going on with not just my son but other children as well but they want me to claim my son told me everything. So I'm going to talk to the principal AGAIN tomorrow.

Question is, how would you handle this? Clearly he doesn't seem to mind that children are getting hurt both physically and emotionally under his watch. Do I threaten legal action? Do I go above him?(not really sure what the next step above him is because I went to a military school growing up and it wasn't the same). Need some advice. Thanks all.
 
sfgoat said:
I have another life advice question for you guys.

So my son has had a bully for about 3 years now. The kid is autistic (or so he is labeled) and about 3 times the size of my son. Keeping in mind my son is 7 and the other kid 8. This kid has been in my son's class since kindergarten and there have been more violent altercations between the two of them than I can count. My son has been stabbed with a pencil, punched, kicked, you name it. We today I get a call from the school nurses office and it's my son on the line crying because this kid beat the crap out of him today and he is too scared to go back to class.

So I leave work and get my son and chat with my son's teacher for a minute. Turns out this kid has many violent outbursts daily and my son is not the only target. The teacher is begging me to talk to the principal again (i have many times now, not that it does any good) because she is scared of this kid and so are some of the other teachers. I asked why they don't rally around the victims and demand the child's removal to an alternative school. Apparently they are scared their jobs are on the line if they do. So I got a lot of info about what is going on with not just my son but other children as well but they want me to claim my son told me everything. So I'm going to talk to the principal AGAIN tomorrow.

Question is, how would you handle this? Clearly he doesn't seem to mind that children are getting hurt both physically and emotionally under his watch. Do I threaten legal action? Do I go above him?(not really sure what the next step above him is because I went to a military school growing up and it wasn't the same). Need some advice. Thanks all.
Click to expand...

Coming from the world of education and I'm not sayin this to be a dick but you have very little legal grounds in terms of bringing suit against the school district. Remember, everyone is entitled to a free public education and there are laws (individuals with disabilities education act) that makes it real tough.

Second, unless it is a private school a teacher or group of teachers should not be fearing for their jobs...that's why there is a union, CBA and tenure. It takes a whole hell of a lot for a principal and school district to fire a tenured teacher...I'm talking minimum 6-8 months.

Third, when you go talk to the principal make sure you make him aware that if the situation is not resolved you will be going to the Superintendent. Once the Superintendent gets involved all bets are off for the principal. Not only do Principals hate it when their boss gets involved it makes them look like ****ty and they don't have control over what's going on in their school.

Biggest thing, don't go in there making threats. Go in calm, cool and collected. Make sure you address all your concerns and be upfront about going to the higher ups if the situation isn't being handled. Remind him that your child is also entitled to a safe school environment and if one isn't provided by the principal you'll go higher up.

Hope this helps, if you need any other advice PM me and I'll be happy to advise you as best I can.
 
sfgoat said:
I have another life advice question for you guys.

So my son has had a bully for about 3 years now. The kid is autistic (or so he is labeled) and about 3 times the size of my son. Keeping in mind my son is 7 and the other kid 8. This kid has been in my son's class since kindergarten and there have been more violent altercations between the two of them than I can count. My son has been stabbed with a pencil, punched, kicked, you name it. We today I get a call from the school nurses office and it's my son on the line crying because this kid beat the crap out of him today and he is too scared to go back to class.

So I leave work and get my son and chat with my son's teacher for a minute. Turns out this kid has many violent outbursts daily and my son is not the only target. The teacher is begging me to talk to the principal again (i have many times now, not that it does any good) because she is scared of this kid and so are some of the other teachers. I asked why they don't rally around the victims and demand the child's removal to an alternative school. Apparently they are scared their jobs are on the line if they do. So I got a lot of info about what is going on with not just my son but other children as well but they want me to claim my son told me everything. So I'm going to talk to the principal AGAIN tomorrow.

Question is, how would you handle this? Clearly he doesn't seem to mind that children are getting hurt both physically and emotionally under his watch. Do I threaten legal action? Do I go above him?(not really sure what the next step above him is because I went to a military school growing up and it wasn't the same). Need some advice. Thanks all.
Click to expand...

Unfortunately, in today's public society you can't fight ignorance and politics. In public schools, you're screwed. Your best bet is putting your kid in a private school if can't get your child changed to another class. I understand that's a big change, maybe unacceptable.

My kids went to public, so I'm not some uppity ivy league type. But as I said, you can't get far in the public area. It's WAY too politically correct.

I did go to private schools when I was young. There wasn't any sort of problem like you're describing there (but there were other problems, more of the uppity ivy league problems you'd expect at private schools; might get yer ass beat by an angry nun :) ).
 

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