SWMBO Woes

Homebrew Talk - Beer, Wine, Mead, & Cider Brewing Discussion Forum

Help Support Homebrew Talk - Beer, Wine, Mead, & Cider Brewing Discussion Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
Not to stir the pot any further, but there seem to be a lot of bitter, defensive brewers here.

I'm over it.

No, I think there are some lazy ones that read the first 3 posts and then posted a knee-jerk comment.

I think its common for the ladies to not whole-heartedly approve of this hobby. They come around eventually. Many brewers are so passionate about this that they can't take anyone saying "No". I'm one of them. I just decided to give advice rather than to criticize.

My wife didn't like it as first, but now I get cash gifts for my hobby at every birthday and xmas. She is ok with it now. She sees how much I enjoy it so there is no point to try and deny me of the activity.
 
I can't go too big on the fridge/freezer get-up. If there's ANY free space, SWMBO will overtake it with food! Need something that fits the bill JUST right! Actually, I may look for a side-by-side that can fit the fermenter. She can have the freezer and I keep the fridge. Think Lowes would mind if I brought in my ale pale for size shopping??
 
It helps a lot for me now that I have gone AG and have taken other steps to greatly reduce the cost of ingredients. Things changed drastically for me when I could show her that I cold brew 10 gallons for $25. Pretty soon I hope to have that down to $18-$20 per 10gals

Once I have finished buying new equipment (Yes, I CAN stop, I can! I can!) Then it will all be pretty much plain sailing, I hope. :)
 
I can't go too big on the fridge/freezer get-up. If there's ANY free space, SWMBO will overtake it with food! Need something that fits the bill JUST right! Actually, I may look for a side-by-side that can fit the fermenter. She can have the freezer and I keep the fridge. Think Lowes would mind if I brought in my ale pale for size shopping??

Way to make it work for ya! The warmest fridge setting may be a touch cooler than ideal but it's a great step in the right direction. Seriously - cruise CL for a couple days. Things are almost free there.
 
I can't go too big on the fridge/freezer get-up. If there's ANY free space, SWMBO will overtake it with food! Need something that fits the bill JUST right! Actually, I may look for a side-by-side that can fit the fermenter. She can have the freezer and I keep the fridge. Think Lowes would mind if I brought in my ale pale for size shopping??

I bought a full size fridge that had a freezer on top. It is my kegorator but my wife does love the extra freezer space it gives us. Some is taken up by the yeast bank and hops, but still a lot of room there for foodstuffs.
 
I bought a full size fridge that had a freezer on top. It is my kegorator but my wife does love the extra freezer space it gives us. Some is taken up by the yeast bank and hops, but still a lot of room there for foodstuffs.


I have the same thing! How many taps?
 
He did you dufus. :D

That's the problem. He has an infant that is top priority right now!

SWMBO will mellow with time (AKA: Not Spaz-out). As said numerous times already; having a budget and planning a brew schedule will correct this whole situation.

AHH THATS MR.DUFUS !
 
No need to bring the pail with you, the 5 gallon buckets are about the same size; use those and they are already at the store waiting for you to carry it around and try. Congrats on the kid and have fun being a parent.

I can't go too big on the fridge/freezer get-up. If there's ANY free space, SWMBO will overtake it with food! Need something that fits the bill JUST right! Actually, I may look for a side-by-side that can fit the fermenter. She can have the freezer and I keep the fridge. Think Lowes would mind if I brought in my ale pale for size shopping??
 
I know I'm responding to this thread pretty late in the process and I have to confess, I haven't read it all..

but I cannot believe it when I hear stories like this who have significant others who don't support your hobby. Jesus Christ, it's a freaking hobby - what is the big deal doing something to stimulate your life from the mundane everyday that we all have to go through?

Now if you're sloppy and keep the house a mess because of brewing or overspend or whatever, I can understand that. But I would simply not allow somebody to make a blanket 'rule' for when I brew.

Unbelievable.
 
I know I'm responding to this thread pretty late in the process and I have to confess, I haven't read it all..

but I cannot believe it when I hear stories like this who have significant others who don't support your hobby. Jesus Christ, it's a freaking hobby - what is the big deal doing something to stimulate your life from the mundane everyday that we all have to go through?

Now if you're sloppy and keep the house a mess because of brewing or overspend or whatever, I can understand that. But I would simply not allow somebody to make a blanket 'rule' for when I brew.

Unbelievable.

Nice knee-jerk reaction there.
 
What the hell is it about this thread that has brought about so much negativity? We've had a ton of similar threads in the past just like this one that have always been a source of good natured ribbing and fun! :confused::confused:
 
do no more than 2 batches per season.


no worries man..


summer
winter
spring
fall
Soccer Season
baseball season
hockey season
football season
duck hunting season
deer hunting season
tennis season
tomatoe season
cabbage season
bananna season
rugby season


there are hundreds more.. you're fine..
 
I know I'm responding to this thread pretty late in the process and I have to confess, I haven't read it all..

but I cannot believe it when I hear stories like this who have significant others who don't support your hobby. Jesus Christ, it's a freaking hobby - what is the big deal doing something to stimulate your life from the mundane everyday that we all have to go through?

Now if you're sloppy and keep the house a mess because of brewing or overspend or whatever, I can understand that. But I would simply not allow somebody to make a blanket 'rule' for when I brew.

Unbelievable.

Nice knee-jerk reaction there.

I 2nd the knee-jerk. All in favor of the knee-jerk say "Aye". :D
 
/non knee jerk/ My wife does regret getting me the Coopers kit as a gift a year and a half ago. It has created some issues with money a couple of times and kicked in her extreme fear of alcoholism that's rampant in both sides of her family.

Other than that, she's resigned herself to my brewing and I work hard to make it as unobtrusive as I can. I communicate brew schedules and ask for her input on what to have on tap. If scheduling conflicts for some reason, I usually change brewing because I'm the only one impacted by it. Family things come first, it's not hard.

As for the money I spend, she doesn't complain any more, but most of the big ticket stuff is done. Most of the money spent now is for ingredients.

Spend some time talking with her about what you get out of brewing, why you enjoy it and let her see the positive impact it has on you. Can't stress enough how much of an impact simply communicating has on any issue.

Best of luck and hope it all works well for your family.
 
I have the same thing! How many taps?

First fridge only had one tap. This one won't have any, instead it has a hole in the side (currently only for Co2) but this summer's project is two PVC pipes going up to the kitchen, 3 perlick taps up there plus the soda wand. The return pipe is for the PC fan to run back in with to circulate cool air, keeping the lines chilled. Pipes will be well insulated.
 
First fridge only had one tap. This one won't have any, instead it has a hole in the side (currently only for Co2) but this summer's project is two PVC pipes going up to the kitchen, 3 perlick taps up there plus the soda wand. The return pipe is for the PC fan to run back in with to circulate cool air, keeping the lines chilled. Pipes will be well insulated.

How much do you charge for labor if I supply the parts? :D
 
I am a really lucky man. I got my beginners brewing kit for Christmas 2008. Since then i have built a kegerator with a three tap setup, i got a beer gun, all the bottles i could ever use, a secondary carboy, :Dand i have brewed 9 batches of beer. My SWMBO is just happy that i have something that i love to do.
 
Pay for the plane ticket and a place to stay, some beer... we'd be good!

I'll pay for the gas and a night at the local Microtel. The latest batch will be conditioned by next weekend (I hope).

I can make it to Chicago in 7hrs from here. I can get to my SWMBO's grandparent's place in Toledo in about 12hrs. Nice scenery down I-65. Very smooth sailing from Indy down. But to save a little $$ and to keep you from having to visit the buckle of the bible belt, I'll just start putting my grandiose ideas on paper and pricing things out. can't do it until we get a bigger house anyway. :(
 
I'll pay for the gas and a night at the local Microtel. The latest batch will be conditioned by next weekend (I hope).

I can make it to Chicago in 7hrs from here. I can get to my SWMBO's grandparent's place in Toledo in about 12hrs. Nice scenery down I-65. Very smooth sailing from Indy down. But to save a little $$ and to keep you from having to visit the buckle of the bible belt, I'll just start putting my grandiose ideas on paper and pricing things out. can't do it until we get a bigger house anyway. :(

Save up some, get a little cash and get into a bigger house before prices start to go up again, then figure out what all you want to do with it. It may already have a basement bar :)
 
Save up some, get a little cash and get into a bigger house before prices start to go up again, then figure out what all you want to do with it. It may already have a basement bar :)

I have wet dreams about having a full basement with a built in bar. Unfortunately, I live in an area that has one of the largest limestone cave systems in the world which means basements are pretty rare due to the instability of the ground. But I can dream.....
 
I have wet dreams about having a full basement with a built in bar. Unfortunately, I live in an area that has one of the largest limestone cave systems in the world which means basements are pretty rare due to the instability of the ground. But I can dream.....

took me a long time to get to this but when I'm dead some dickhead will rip it out and put a playroom there...

bar_flames.jpg


bar_couch.jpg
 
I couldn't have said it any better. We met in 1977, married in 1988, and after 21 years of marriage we're still going strong! And, congrats on the baby.

Way to go- you're a married senior, all right. My wife & I tied the knot August '69, so #40 is coming up this August. I have only one thing to contribute to this thread.......since it's really about marriage, not beer. There's you, there's her, and there's the marriage. Deciding which of those three is important -for both of you- is the trick.

_____________

"Everything in the world- whatever is and whatever happens- is a test, designed to give you freedom of choice. Choose wisely."

-Rebbe Nachman of Breslov
 
God am I happy Im not married. I can tell my "SWMBO" to f**k off if Id like and go find another one who does accept me and what I do!!!
 
I...HATE...YOU.

That said, when I can I come over?

Anytime, the pic is old so the couch is gone and there is a flat screen LCD on the wall now ohh and a beer on tap.


Stays the perfect temp for fermenting around 65° spring and fall low 50's during the summer with A/c on winter I can do saisons down there with the woodstove going.


and we can do some brewing wonder if the would let you on a plane with a Corny?
 
Anytime, the pic is old so the couch is gone and there is a flat screen LCD on the wall now ohh and a beer on tap.


Stays the perfect temp for fermenting around 65° spring and fall low 50's during the summer with A/c on winter I can do saisons down there with the woodstove going.


and we can do some brewing wonder if the would let you on a plane with a Corny?

That shouldn't be a problem. Just pay freight shipping and send it up a week before I fly. But I'd have to buy one first :drunk:! Maybe bottles would be cheaper.
 
Ok, since the thread has stopped being about farts, I can chip in:

If you think that any time you aren't allowed to do everything you want to it's a woman ripping off your balls, I don't think marriage is for you. I don't get to do or buy everything I want, and you know what? That's a good thing. I have some stupid goddamn ideas sometimes. I'd also blow more money than I should on hobbies (video games and beer/brewing). My wife understands and supports my hobby, even though she doesn't like beer (any beer; don't tell me to make a wit or some apfelwein, she just isn't a drinker), but if I start to spend too much money on it then she points it out, and I cool it down a bit.

We were talking about finances, as there's a baby on the way, and she said 'it's not that expensive once you stop buying equipment' (as I just got some kegging stuff on the cheap). I said 'Yeah, I'm done... oh, except I need to convert another cooler so I can fly sparge. Then I'm done.' I got the exasperated-but-tolerant look I'm so used to, and then we moved on :)

I probably have a more 'restrictive' marriage than a lot of people do, but whatever. We keep each other within reason.
 
Ok, since the thread has stopped being about farts, I can chip in:

If you think that any time you aren't allowed to do everything you want to it's a woman ripping off your balls, I don't think marriage is for you. I don't get to do or buy everything I want, and you know what? That's a good thing. I have some stupid goddamn ideas sometimes. I'd also blow more money than I should on hobbies (video games and beer/brewing). My wife understands and supports my hobby, even though she doesn't like beer (any beer; don't tell me to make a wit or some apfelwein, she just isn't a drinker), but if I start to spend too much money on it then she points it out, and I cool it down a bit.

We were talking about finances, as there's a baby on the way, and she said 'it's not that expensive once you stop buying equipment' (as I just got some kegging stuff on the cheap). I said 'Yeah, I'm done... oh, except I need to convert another cooler so I can fly sparge. Then I'm done.' I got the exasperated-but-tolerant look I'm so used to, and then we moved on :)

I probably have a more 'restrictive' marriage than a lot of people do, but whatever. We keep each other within reason.

I'm gathering people who share all the expenses have a situation like yours. Mine is very similar.
 
God am I happy Im not married. I can tell my "SWMBO" to f**k off if Id like and go find another one who does accept me and what I do!!!

What you are describing there is the selection process. Nothing unusual about that. One day, though, while you are out trying to make your selection, you will find that some unforeseen force has done a bad deed on you and it is in fact YOU that have been selected.

Once life deals you this fatal blow you will come to realise that you think so much about the happiness of this damn witch that you can never be happy yourself unless you are continually reminded (By her) that she is, indeed, also happy.

She will then test your resolve by attempting to destroy your happiness by making unreasonable demands. Naturally, you will resist, but you find that if you do not make a deal with the she-devil whereby you both sacrifice certain things in order that you gain "Contentment equilibrium" You will be destined to be eternally miserable......And also get no nookie.

You wouldn't bother gambling on a slot machine where you won all the time as would be the case with a totally submissive woman. A man needs the pressure of possible defeat to keep life interesting.

Love is not a pink heart on a Hallmark card. It is a curse on mankind in which the male of the species must continually struggle to gain his own happiness by means of satiating the batcrap crazy stupid whims of the lady with the snaky hair.
 
What you are describing there is the selection process. Nothing unusual about that. One day, though, while you are out trying to make your selection, you will find that some unforeseen force has done a bad deed on you and it is in fact YOU that have been selected.

Once life deals you this fatal blow you will come to realise that you think so much about the happiness of this damn witch that you can never be happy yourself unless you are continually reminded (By her) that she is, indeed, also happy.

She will then test your resolve by attempting to destroy your happiness by making unreasonable demands. Naturally, you will resist, but you find that if you do not make a deal with the she-devil whereby you both sacrifice certain things in order that you gain "Contentment equilibrium" You will be destined to be eternally miserable......And also get no nookie.

You wouldn't bother gambling on a slot machine where you won all the time as would be the case with a totally submissive woman. A man needs the pressure of possible defeat to keep life interesting.

Love is not a pink heart on a Hallmark card. It is a curse on mankind in which the male of the species must continually struggle to gain his own happiness by means of satiating the batcrap crazy stupid whims of the lady with the snaky hair.

I, in my most succinct and eloquent moods, could not have achieved this definitive expression and conveyance of wisdom.

I wanted to italicize and bold the whole post, from the merits of each individual paragraph, all on it's own (even though they turn ital.); but the whole post would have ended up being italicized and bold.

:mug:
 
Love is not a pink heart on a Hallmark card. It is a curse on mankind in which the male of the species must continually struggle to gain his own happiness by means of satiating the batcrap crazy stupid whims of the lady with the snaky hair.

My man, you couldn't have said it better! Permission to quote this in my sig?!?!?!?!?
 
I hate to rub it in, but my wife just rolled her eyes when I bought a house because it has a brewing studio in the basement. She begs me to brew. Our kind of compromise is that 1) I have to drink at least half of the beer that I make and 2) I have to keep a supply of her favorite homebrews on hand (her favorites are a crazy hoppy IPA and a very hoppy red ale).

I'm new to the forum, so please let me know if tolerant-wife-gloat is strictly forbidden.
 
LGI, are you sober, WTF, I actually understood everything you just said. I dont like this side of you....LOL
 
I hate to rub it in, but my wife just rolled her eyes when I bought a house because it has a brewing studio in the basement. She begs me to brew. Our kind of compromise is that 1) I have to drink at least half of the beer that I make and 2) I have to keep a supply of her favorite homebrews on hand (her favorites are a crazy hoppy IPA and a very hoppy red ale).

I'm new to the forum, so please let me know if tolerant-wife-gloat is strictly forbidden.


Go right ahead, despite what Laughing Gnome just said , I have a totally submissive wife that I would not trade for the shiniest brew gear. She doesnt care what I do with OUR money, never ever ask me why I'm buying something, and on weekends she just gets dressed cuz she knows we're going somewhere. During the drive , she'll ask where we're going. I love her! However, the important thing here, she trust me and my decisions. Gloat away. :mug:
 
Back
Top