A "crappy" situation

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Bombeque

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So, there I was, Friday night, milling away all my grains for a ten gallon batch of a Leffe blonde clone. So excited because it was my first ten gallon batch and I was going to test the actual capacity of my ten gallon mash tun. So after milling the grains, it became evident that all 23lbs of grain for this monster batch wasnt going to fit in my 5 gallon bucket for storing overnight. So I had to use a pot to put the rest of the grains in. It was a bit too hot to let the grains stay in garage overnight I thought, so last minute decision I proceeded to bring the grains inside and set the covered bucket and uncovered pot on the floor.
Next morning, jumping out of bed in excitement, I started getting the strike water drawn and heated. Everything was going so smooth, as soon as I added the grains, I hit my temp dead on. No need for stirring to get the temp down, or adding hot water ect. Threw the lid on and let her sit for an hour. Came back to my temp spiking on my digital thermometer (cheap), so just to be safe I decided to pop open the lid and throw in ole trusty (analog thermometer) to calm my fears. Whew, everything was good....cept there was what looked like a doughball floating at the top of the grain bed...had I not mixed the grains well enough?? I poked it with my finger to try and distribute it.....strange I thought, since when are dough balls mustard yellow?? Out of instinct I suppose, I smelled my finger, strange I thought, since when did dough balls smell like ****???? AAAAAAAHHH!!!!!, there is **** in my mash!!!! At first I though, that damn homebrew supply, an animal got in there, **** in my grains and he sold it to me! Then I thought, I milled these grains last night myself, so it had to have happened last night. Then the truth hit me like a ton of bricks....I left the uncovered grain just 15 feet from my cat's litter box. Upon further inspection, there were grains kicked all over the floor. I have no idea how I didnt smell it during dough in, but Im glad I caught it when I did. Interesting concept though....cat**** beer, could be the next big thing, hell Dogfish used chewed up corn in one of their beers!lol

Lesson learned!

Que
 
John Palmer should add this to the 4th edition of "How to Brew" under the "Why Boiling is Important" section.
 
Hahah, thanks guys. Sadly I had to dump the whole thing.. I just couldnt live with myself, drinking or giving the beer out. Surprisingly enough I like my in-laws, so that option is out!
 
Sorry for your loss, but thanks for sharing the story, I added your story to my list "reasons why I don't want a cat".
 
Im glad I could atleast make a good story out of it! Though it was NOT funny at the time, its getting funnier and funnier as the days go by. And no, the cat is still alive...only because I couldnt catch him! And just like a dog would, he hid all day because he knew he screwed up. Next time, Lawd help me if theres a next time, Ill rub his nose in the mash!
 
LMAO!!!
Sorry to hear about your problem and I truly feel for your situation, but on the lighter side thanks for brightening my day.

Redbeard5289
 
Damn cats ****ting where they dont belong! Haha i have been battling with a neighborhood cat that seems to thing my hop pots are a perfect place for it to do its business.
 
That is hilarious. As an aside, we use a cat litter that is 100% milled wheat. It is the best litter on the planet- you can never smell the cat box. Expensive, but when you live in 580sqft with two cats, you will pay whatever it costs to not smell the litter box when you come home. Anyway, I've often found myself looking at a brand new bag of litter going "I wonder if I could mash that- it's probably just unmalted wheat."
 
That is hilarious. As an aside, we use a cat litter that is 100% milled wheat. It is the best litter on the planet- you can never smell the cat box. Expensive, but when you live in 580sqft with two cats, you will pay whatever it costs to not smell the litter box when you come home. Anyway, I've often found myself looking at a brand new bag of litter going "I wonder if I could mash that- it's probably just unmalted wheat."

That is interesting, probably had something to do with the fact that I couldnt smell anything out of the ordinary even while doughing in!
 
Didn't see that one coming, thought for sure this was going to be about rodents or something.

If it makes you feel any better you at least got a laugh out of me. Probably not worth it, but it's something.
 
I heard that the old german brewers kept cats in the brewery to protect the grain from rodents, but they had a terrible time keeping the cats from doing their business in the same grain. I think I heard Kaiser translate that from a german textbook on a podcast.
 
sounds pretty gross- but historically speaking some breweries' waters were little more than raw sewage. life is ****ty, boil hard.
 
Glad there are laughs to be had, oh and btw, something I forgot to mention, As I was moving the full tun from the floor to the table to begin sparging some spilled on my shirt, so I said what the heck, Ill taste my shirt for sweetness! Sure was sweet....:(
 
Ah yes, here it is:

Many brewers use cats to control the destruction brought on by mice in the malt storage. While the cats don't eat malt they have a bad habit that cannot be broken. They never leave their droppings on the open floor but always bury it in the malt. While the dry matter is easily removed through sieving later it is the wet excrements that that penetrate the malt and give a disgusting taste and aroma that can make its way into the beer. I found it interesting that the author dedicated two full paragraphs to elaborate on the problem with cats and their excrements which means that this was a real problem back then.​

From Kai Troester's excellent site.

Half way down, Wort Production | Malt Milling
 
In reference to PassedPawn's post

So maybe I'm stating the obvious but the CatCrap beer was brewed and distributed?

People were tougher or more stupid then, depends on how you look at it.

I think ignorant and tough would be my answer.

Drink up!
 
This is why cats make better targets than pets. . .

Great story! Good midnight shift entertainment for me.
 
I guess the quesiton to all is....whould you have dumped it or gone for it.

One vote here for go for it but add a little extra aroma hops just in case.

PROST
 
When I saw "Crappy" in the title I thought:drunk:....."Na can't be" Welp....color me wrong

And NO......would have dumped it too
 

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