The stupidest comment on your beer

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Friend one: "tastes like soy sauce." ( oatmeal stout that does NOT taste like soy sauce)

Friend two: "taste like Coors light." ( my first Oktoberfest that, while wasn't great, definitely has more flavor than Coors.)

I need new friends : /.
 
wuilliez said:
Friend one: "tastes like soy sauce." ( oatmeal stout that does NOT taste like soy sauce)

Friend two: "taste like Coors light." ( my first Oktoberfest that, while wasn't great, definitely has more flavor than Coors.)

I need new friends : /.
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Actually man I've had at least 2 stouts show up at the Homebrew meetings that tasted distinctly of soy sauce. Maybe he was right ;)
 
My Sis-in-law's dumb friend commented after tasting my smokey Scottish ale at the local brewpub: "Tastes a lot like Sam Adams. I like wheat beers, but my ex hated dark beer. I can't stand light beers, I like really dark beer."

Just then the waitress comes over and the girl asks to try the "heelies", (waitress gives confused look), "hellys?"... (looks to me) "what's it called?" (I look at the chalkboard and see "Highway to Helles" Maibock listed) "She'll have the Helles".

This girl is dumb as a box of hammers and never stops talking. At least she likes beer.
 
masonsjax said:
My Sis-in-law's dumb friend commented after tasting my smokey Scottish ale at the local brewpub: "Tastes a lot like Sam Adams. I like wheat beers, but my ex hated dark beer. I can't stand light beers, I like really dark beer."

Just then the waitress comes over and the girl asks to try the "heelies", (waitress gives confused look), "hellys?"... (looks to me) "what's it called?" (I look at the chalkboard and see "Highway to Helles" Maibock listed) "She'll have the Helles".

This girl is dumb as a box of hammers and never stops talking. At least she likes beer.
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She must be hot then!
 
I get the Sam Adams one a lot for anything that isn't an IPA or a stout. I guess I can see where it's coming from, though. Recently a coworker told me the pale ale i gave him was "really heavy, like a Guinness. I couldn't drink more than one." This was about a month after explaining to him that Guinness wasn't heavy, just dark.
 
"This is really heavy, and alcoholic." - Sorority girl about my 3.8% super dry Irish stout. I guess the theme is that BMC drinkers equate dark with those traits regardless.
 
So SWMBO works at a restaurant that you could classify as "casual fine-dining"

So this dude, who doesn't look a day over 21, orders an Icky IPA, the flagship beer of a local brewery that is actually quite awesome.

Dude: "I ordered this because your selection isn't great" (They have Stella, Modelo, Old Rasputin, Angel Creek Amber (stellar local beer that is the epitome of American Ambers), as well as a variety of excellent beers in bottles)

SWMBO recommends Angel Creek Amber as it's sweeter on the malty side but has a nice hop punch.

Dude: "Ambers are for novices." (When she told me that I lost my s**t)

SWMBO convinces him to get the Angel Creek anyway and he (begrudgingly) loves it.

He then proceeds to order a Raspberry Vodka martini with a chambord float, possibly the girliest drink the restaurant makes.


Oh wanna-be beer snobs... you are amazing.
 
Reno_eNVy said:
So SWMBO works at a restaurant that you could classify as "casual fine-dining"

So this dude, who doesn't look a day over 21, orders an Icky IPA, the flagship beer of a local brewery that is actually quite awesome.

Dude: "I ordered this because your selection isn't great" (They have Stella, Modelo, Old Rasputin, Angel Creek Amber (stellar local beer that is the epitome of American Ambers), as well as a variety of excellent beers in bottles)

SWMBO recommends Angel Creek Amber as it's sweeter on the malty side but has a nice hop punch.

Dude: "Ambers are for novices." (When she told me that I lost my s**t)

SWMBO convinces him to get the Angel Creek anyway and he (begrudgingly) loves it.

He then proceeds to order a Raspberry Vodka martini with a chambord float, possibly the girliest drink the restaurant makes.

Oh wanna-be beer snobs... you are amazing.
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What? Ambers aren't for novices? :)
 
Reno_eNVy said:
Dude: "Ambers are for novices."

He then proceeds to order a Raspberry Vodka martini with a chambord float...
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Ambers are for novices, but raspberry vodka martinis are for EXPERIENCED beer drinkers!
 
Me: what'd you think of my first batch? (made a brown porter)

FIL: it was really good, tasted like PBR.

Haha I can assure you that it looked, tasted, or smelled nothing like PBR and it took every ounce of energy I had to not bust out laughing.
 
bjl110 said:
"This is really heavy, and alcoholic." - Sorority girl about my 3.8% super dry Irish stout. I guess the theme is that BMC drinkers equate dark with those traits regardless.
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biggest pet peeve of the style is when somebody tries a dry stout with that rxn. Its like they're not using anything but their eyes to taste the beer.:mad:
 
Not about my beer, but beer in general. I work at a bar and was doing takeout, which is set up near the bar. We have a pretty decent selection on tap. Bell's 2 hearted, Oberon, Founders All Day IPA, and some other local beers.

I hear the bartender talking to a customer within 15 feet of me, about how he came to Michigan because he can't find any good beer in Florida. He actually said there is no good beer in Florida.

I slowly walked over and started talking to him a little bit and told him to check out Cigar City as well as a few other smaller breweries. He had never heard of any of them. He then proceeded to drink two pints of Labatt Blue and leave. Had a laugh with the bartender after he left.
 
cfonnes said:
Utah made those kits illegal. The state figures that the product is marketed to underage drinkers.
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A garden hose stuck in a 2 liter bottle and draped down the side will do essentially the same thing as those kits and doesn't require purchasing anything if you use bread yeast. I guess you could go all out and put the end of the hose in some water but /shrug.

That said, Having spent at least half my life in Alabama... I'm not about to ridicule Utah's laws.
 
From my SO's he-man dad:

After trying my first HB, a pale ale:
"Pretty good, but I'm not really an ale fan"

After trying my brown ale:
"Not bad, but too rich for me and too much ale taste."

On my Kolsch:
"Ok, not really a fan of the ale taste"

About Joe's Premium American pilsner:
"Meh... too much ale taste"

On macro-lagers:
Him: "Miller light is pretty good, but I think Heiniken light is my favorite beer. Regular Heineken tastes too much like an ale, but the light really hits the spot."
Me: "I don't think it's ales that you don't like, I think you just don't like beer taste."
Him: *Offended grumblings*
 
I guess my beers are referred to as my "strong" beers 5-6%:confused: I guess for in a light beer kind of mind-frame.
 
Them: *Picks up a bottle labeled "Two Hearted", Opens. Takes a swig*
"God, I've missed this beer. This whole summer, I have been without anything hoppy."

Me: "That's a hefeweizen. I didn't bother removing the label on that one."
Them: "What's a hoof-a-...what?"
*Silence*
Them: "Whatever, it's hoppy and I like it."

*facepalm*
 
wSelwyn said:
Them: *Picks up a bottle labeled "Two Hearted", Opens. Takes a swig*
"God, I've missed this beer. This whole summer, I have been without anything hoppy."

Me: "That's a hefeweizen. I didn't bother removing the label on that one."
Them: "What's a hoof-a-...what?"
*Silence*
Them: "Whatever, it's hoppy and I like it."

*facepalm*
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The placebo beer! The mind is powerful! :mug:
 
Me: "Try this! I worked really hard on getting a nice balance with the hops so there's lots of citrusy taste without too much bitter"
My dad: " Wow, it's fizzy and everything.. as long as it's cheap and it gets the job done eh??"
 
Not my beer, but I just stopped at the store where they were doing a tasting of New Holland's double IPA, which I thought was really, really good. The two other guys about puked. Apparently had never tasted hops.
 
Airhead co worker in response to a dry hopped 6.5% IPA : "So how many mixed Vodka drinks is one of these?"
 
Not a comment, but a reaction. When I was brewing for Jersey Jim's Brewing Company back in the late '90's, I did a brewfest at Split Rock in the Pocono Mountains. I took my Barley Wine, which was a great and very intense beer (Sam Calagione of Dogfish was very complimentary). A young foursome came up to me and inquired about the beers. They all opted for the BW, even though I suspected they wouldn't like it, especially the girls, who seemed more like the pink drink types. One girl took a sip, and raced to a garbage can to spit it out -- she couldn't get there fast enough. The funniest reaction to my beer I ever saw.
 
At a get together at my brother's tonight:

Friend's gf: "what are you drinking?"
Me: "It's some home brew I made."
Friend's gf: "I've never heard of that before. Can I see the bottle? Where did you get it?"

I laughed and explained what home brew is.
 
0202 said:
Airhead co worker in response to a dry hopped 6.5% IPA : "So how many mixed Vodka drinks is one of these?"
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that's actually an awesome comment, and a great alternative to standard forms of measure. like using the "mandingo" to measure length- as in "a football field is 286.2 mandingos long". yes, you need a calculator, but that's why excel was invented. or, as some believe, was discovered by nazi ufo pilots, in a frozen asteroid.
 
wSelwyn said:
Them: *Picks up a bottle labeled "Two Hearted", Opens. Takes a swig*
"God, I've missed this beer. This whole summer, I have been without anything hoppy."

Me: "That's a hefeweizen. I didn't bother removing the label on that one."
Them: "What's a hoof-a-...what?"
*Silence*
Them: "Whatever, it's hoppy and I like it."

*facepalm*
Click to expand...

bottlebomber said:
The placebo beer! The mind is powerful! :mug:
Click to expand...

Back in college we used to have parties and fill an empty handle of grey goose with $9 a handle cheap vodka. Everyone would think we were always making drinks and giving away free goose so we threw the best parties....no one ever questioned that it didn't taste like goose so we'd always laugh the morning after.

But back to beer, the stupidest comment I've gotten so at (and keep in mind I'm relatively new to this whole thing) was "well it looks like beer"
 
Not really a comment, but a reaction. My friend's wife is a germaphobe. They came over for the first time and got a tour of the house to include the brew room. She looked at a sour, which actually looks pretty clear with almost no pellicle, and about got sick. Then I showed her some kombucha brewing in the kitchen cabinets paired with me taking a piece of fermenting sauerkraut out of its crock and eating it. She actually gagged and had to leave the room.:cross:
 
Ok, so having finally had the time to read the thousand or so posted comments I hadn't had a chance to read through previously....

I can see having to define dark (or of the levels you mean by it when you say it) to a bartender of a restaurant not really known for their beer but in a pub? I'm sorry, if a bartender is that dense there's no way I'm spending the 7.50-12.00 it costs for much nicer beers. For cheap swill-like man-sodas? Not even reasonable. Besides (on a slightly different note), I kinda enjoy Amber Bock from Michelob occasionally and in a pinch plus it's actually pretty decent to make chili with. I also thought Bud Ale was tolerable and the bottles are kinda nice as they're the darkest glass bottles I've ever come across and block light better than any of the others I have.

Also, at the risk of borderline derailment... Can't an e-peen contest over who can chug the most Homebrew kind of be applicable to the stupidest comment about your homebrew thread? ;)

And while I do agree that it's always a preferable to educate someone who says something silly or ignorant when given the chance... If their behavior continues to be unreasonable with a mocking or dismissive argumentative air then they deserve whatever abuse they are encouraging. IE, I don't go into to the Mechanic's work area and inform him how to fix my car... I answer his questions as best I can and defer to his wisdom as he clearly knows more than I do about the topic.




Speaking of which, and somewhat back on topic, I gave my cupcake Uncle one of the experimental beers we made recently with a high capsaicin(sp?) content and a moderate hop content. For some weird reason though the hop bitter and the pepper spiciness separated very quickly in the bottle even after pouring almost like a Black and Tan (not really sure why and I didn't find a lot of people posting similar experiences). He starting drinking it with his typical mocking air about how could I like such a "flowery" beer... Followed abruptly about 2/3rds of the way through it by him screaming all the way to the sink to bury his head under the sink. I'm sure Karma will come back to bite me on the butt someday but I'm still kicking myself for not having the foresight to tape that :).
 
that sounds aweful... but i bet you enjoyed it..

I had someone ask me "why would you want spice and bananas in a beer..."
my reply...
"So you wont drink it all... "
 
To be fair is an extreme @#&$. I so pity his "We're raising him to be non-violent!" son who takes repetitive beatings from the other kids and can't understand why.
 
This wasn't a comment on my beer, but it was stupid by someone who should know better, so I thought it kinda applies.

I went to a large beer store recently looking for some Jolly Pumpkin. I browsed for a while, because in my little town there is no selection. The clerk, who seemed nice enough, asked me if I needed help picking something out (I'm sure lots of people do, large selection can be intimidating if you don't know what you are doing). I said no thanks, I'm fine. I picked out a couple of sixers of stuff I can't get at home, but couldn't find the JP, which I knew they carry. I found the clerk and asked him if they had any JP, at which point he laughed at me and told me they only carry that stuff in the Fall. I tried to explain that JP was a brewery and not a pumpkin beer. That didn't change his answer. This went on for a minute, but seeing that he was getting agitated i dropped it. Well, maybe they stopped carrying it, I thought. I went to check out and the cashier asked me if I found everything. "No, actually. Do you guys still carry Jolly Pumpkin? Its a brewery, not a pumpkin beer". She looked it up and found plenty in stock. The clerk made his way over by now, and she asked him if he knew where it was. The clerk looked at me, "Ugh, I *told* you we don't carry that except in the Fall!" At this point the manager came over and asked the clerk what the problem was. He told the manager the story, at which point the manager started laughing at him. The manager turned to me and said "I'll show you where it is, we have plenty". :) Maybe the guy was having a bad day, maybe it was his first day. Either way, more than a little rude to get snippy when you don't understand what is being asked. Ah well, the JP tasted great anyway!
 
bjl110 said:
This wasn't a comment on my beer, but it was stupid by someone who should know better, so I thought it kinda applies.

I went to a large beer store recently looking for some Jolly Pumpkin. I browsed for a while, because in my little town there is no selection. The clerk, who seemed nice enough, asked me if I needed help picking something out (I'm sure lots of people do, large selection can be intimidating if you don't know what you are doing). I said no thanks, I'm fine. I picked out a couple of sixers of stuff I can't get at home, but couldn't find the JP, which I knew they carry. I found the clerk and asked him if they had any JP, at which point he laughed at me and told me they only carry that stuff in the Fall. I tried to explain that JP was a brewery and not a pumpkin beer. That didn't change his answer. This went on for a minute, but seeing that he was getting agitated i dropped it. Well, maybe they stopped carrying it, I thought. I went to check out and the cashier asked me if I found everything. "No, actually. Do you guys still carry Jolly Pumpkin? Its a brewery, not a pumpkin beer". She looked it up and found plenty in stock. The clerk made his way over by now, and she asked him if he knew where it was. The clerk looked at me, "Ugh, I *told* you we don't carry that except in the Fall!" At this point the manager came over and asked the clerk what the problem was. He told the manager the story, at which point the manager started laughing at him. The manager turned to me and said "I'll show you where it is, we have plenty". :) Maybe the guy was having a bad day, maybe it was his first day. Either way, more than a little rude to get snippy when you don't understand what is being asked. Ah well, the JP tasted great anyway!
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What a jerk. But hey, JP has been acquired so all is good!

And the manager seemed like a nice enough fellow.
 
Yup. Got the JP so it's ok by me. :) Snagged a Noel de Calabaza (which I've not had before, and now love) from a batch back in September 2010. It was nice and funky.
 
Cupcake, carebear, pansy, fruit loop, sissy, girlie man (actually that's unfair to the multitudes of women with far bigger stones than he has...), princess, ninny..... You get the idea.
 

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