Best response to telling someone you homebrew

"I prefer to grow my own hydroponic marijuana"

"Can you drink it?"

How big is your still?

Richard said:

"I prefer to grow my own hydroponic marijuana"

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"That's nice. However, I don't risk spending 10 years in club fed for manufacture of a controlled substance."

"Oh? What kind of beer do you brew?"

"Lots of different kinds. Ales mostly."

"Oh. I don't like ales."

"Oh? More of a lager man, huh?"

"No, I don't like lagers either. Just beer."

That was the actual conversation between me and one of my neighbors.

My mother-in-law actually asked me:

"So what's the difference between ale and beer?"

<face-palm>

"I hope its better than the last homemade beer I had, my buddy in college made some pisswater."

"You can go blind from that, you know!"

When I told my dad I was going to start brewing my own beer he said, "Oh, it starts with beer, but soon you'll be making your own meth."

johnnyc said:

"I hope its better than the last homemade beer I had, my buddy in college made some pisswater."

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"the last one I had was crap" - I've heard that a few times. Of course they are pleasantly surprised when they try mine!

It's usually what kind of beers do you make, how much beer, is it hard to do, etc. - usually positive. I guess the weirdest response I got was "Is your family German?" I do have a good amount German blood in my family tree, but the question really was not the usual response I'm conditioned to hearing.

the first batch i did was in college in my buddies TINY apartment, and the A**hole up above us called the cops because he saw/smelled the hops,thought it was pot, the cops came and and asked whats going on and,,,we said officer "were makin beer" they came inside and were perplexed..that this was possible but it was the old police guy that said ahhh s__t ive made worse stuff than this on a stove!

My neighbor says:

It's takes 4-6 weeks to make beer?

I can drink it faster then you can make. You can't keep up.

My prohibition laden grandma (love her dearly) came over and wanted to see my garden. We walk back and she see's my 18' high hop trellis and ask, "what in the world is that?!" I say "i'm growing preservatives and bittering agents". She asks for what. I say I make my own beer. She *gasps* and says, "Your kidding... just don't drink that stuff"

I respond, "Oh no! I use it to repel all the neighborhood dogs"

marubozo said:

When I told my dad I was going to start brewing my own beer he said, "Oh, it starts with beer, but soon you'll be making your own meth."

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LMAO! That is so classic! My buddy and I brew in my driveway so all the neighbors can see. We wear flip flops, dark sunglasses and blare floyd or bob marley - it is hilarious to see all the looks we get!

macabra11 said:

LMAO! That is so classic! My buddy and I brew in my driveway so all the neighbors can see. We wear flip flops, dark sunglasses and blare floyd or bob marley - it is hilarious to see all the looks we get!

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I get the same reaction from the local cops. I brew in my driveway area. I got a digital scale, bags of hops, bags of corn sugar, big boiling pot and bags of grains all laid out. They just kinda drive by slowly, but never stop to ask what I am doing.....yet.

"I want in."

As a newb (1.5 batches under my belt) We are having my wifes family and some friends over on July 12th for my sons 4th Bday and Im smoking a brisket and a turkey along with offering my 4wk old English Brown Ale...I cannot wait until I get the cynical comments regarding my beer making from people who occasionally drink from the Big 3...Im sure my father in law will be a pain in the ass about it...He already thinks my wife and I are pompous...lol...I think ill have fun with it...

So, you brew your own beer.... huh.





















that is it.

Isnt it expensive? Response, at first!

"this is the first dark beer i've ever liked!"

Recusit8m said:

Im sure my father in law will be a pain in the ass about it...He already thinks my wife and I are pompous...lol...I think ill have fun with it...

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Tell him you think he's very judgemental which is exactly why you wanted him to judge your beer. Backhanded compliments are God's gift to insults.

"when are you going to start making whiskey?" my dad everytime i tell him what i am brewing this weekend.

"Do you make it in your bathtub?"

I always get "How high of alcohol content can you make?" as one of the first questions. I tell em I don't care for high alcohol beer and they look at me funny.

Just today the parts delivery guy told me if I put sugar in it it would have more alcohol. I just smile and nod my head.

And of course "I had some homebrew, it wasn't even drinkable"

Or "Pisswater"

David Sitting here sampling the best Oatmeal Stout I have ever had!

I guess the word is out on mine because everyone I talk to is pissy because I have not invited them over to have some. Everyone who has come over for beer keeps asking me what new beer I have on tap.

You'd be surprised at how many redneck BMC chuggers there are in my area.

Actually, I once chatted up the cute girl at the bank, hoping to give her some (beer), but her husband is recovering and she would have to sneak it in the garage. (somehow that seems backwards...)

"Do you brew dark beers or light beers?"

Does it taste good???

No, thats why I do it!

I showed a friend my setup and the beer on tap - he says "I would try it but keg beer gives me a head-ache" --- but we all ways get pitchers from the bar?
WTF?

My friends are all excited that I'm doing this, they keep asking me stupid questions like "is it illegal?" why does it take so long?

My best response yet was when I asked my dad what his favorite STYLE of beer was. And he starts going on welll I really like yuengling, and killians is good, but i f#*$&ing hate bud...

I just left it at that

One I used to hear all the time, "Won't that stuff make you go blind?"

the worst...almost makes me want to just walk away from someone mid conversation.

"Oh, so are you an alcoholic or something?"

"Hey bro, I'm going to start making my own beer!"

"You know you have to serve that at room temperature right?"

"Why?"

*Forgotten this part of the converstaion*

"All home brewed beer tastes like top ramen"

"Uh, no."


Needless to say, now he want's to save my beer for special occasions and asks politely if he can have some

"I won't drink that ****."

"Do you make that dark stuff? I don't like that"

"Can you make it taste like Bud Light?" yes, I can..........

"How long does it take? Yikes, I can't wait that long!"

"Is it expensive?"

"I can't handle that stuff. It's too strong. I get drunk too fast"

"How much do you make at a time? Ten gallons? Yikes, you better go to AA"

"Won't it make you go blind?" Yes, I too have heard that one

"Have you gotten to taste any of it yet?"

Lulz... Yes. I have.

#1 that I just hate to hear "oh you like that thick beer".
or
"you must be pretty good at it if you can drink it, cuz I heard that it is hard to make and taste like sh*t"
or
"better not let that slip out in the wrong company or you could be arrested"
or
"Isn't that the stuff they feed to cows"
or
"can you make bud light?"

tenglert said:

One I used to hear all the time, "Won't that stuff make you go blind?"

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Only my Masturbation Mild. Puts hair on your chest and palms.

My father in law asked "so what kind of alcohol do you put in it?" It took me a second to realize that he thought I mixed up some flavor ingredients and dumped vodka or something in to add alcohol.

Most people just ask if they can taste it, then the next question after tasting is if they can buy it.

A friend of mine on his first sample of my homebrew:

"Wow, this actually tastes like beer!"

Um, thanks I guess?