The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

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Dudes. I just found out there's a 30-tap pub, all local micros, opening on May 1st, within a couple hundred yards of the house. How the hell does this kind of vital information escape me?
 
Ok, you've been flapping your trap about how I'm somehow afraid to go pig vs pig with you for way too long. Bring it on, biatch. Lets pick a day, invite everyone we know and just do it. I consider you a friend and I'm going to feel bad about it but I am SO going to leave you standing there pants less. Just remember, when everyone is standing there looking at you and laughing, you brought it on yourself.
 
I need to get a smoker of some kind. I looked at the one that Cape recommended to me, but I'm not sure I can get behind going electric. I just picture Myron looking at that thing, slowly shaking his head with a dismissive frown on his face. I've got a nice built-in propane grill, but my charcoal grill got thunder****ed by a 150-pound chubnk of ice at the old house, and I've held off on replacing it because I know the ones I see at The Depot are junk that will rust out in two seasons.

Other than getting an old oil tank and cutting it up, any recommendations?
 
I have an electric. There is nothing wrong with it. It is easy to use, not as much work, and there is nothing better than having a remote. Who wants to constantly check the smoker in the cold winter? Smoker temp and internal temp from the couch, nothing better.
 
I like my Weber Smokey Mountain. Charcoal, holds temp well (even in cold weather), small footprint, surprisingly large cooking capacity for its size, and it's a fecking Weber.
 
bluemoose said:
I have an electric. There is nothing wrong with it. It is easy to use, not as much work, and there is nothing better than having a remote. Who wants to constantly check the smoker in the cold winter? Smoker temp and internal temp from the couch, nothing better.
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Understood. I'm not saying my hesitation to go electric is completely rational. Electric's probably the best choice for smoking malt, since it seems like it's got to be easier to keep the temp on the low side. And I've got an outlet right there on the patio, so it would be all kinds of convenient.

But... fire good! Ooooga oooga!
 
Hey, I'm with you on that. Fire is good, and Ibelieve, based on nothing more scientific than opinion, that smoke from a fire is better than smoke from an electric element. That said, I own an electric and use it a ton. It's great. But you'll pop a chub when you cast your eyes on that one I mentioned before. And it weighs a friggin' ton, it's made out of plate steel. You'll pass it down to your kids when you croak.
 
the_bird said:
Yeah, it's also like $1,700. I haven't figured out a budget for a smoker yet, but it ain't seventeen hundred.
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Go big or go home.

What's more important, paying for the Spawns college or the ability to make fantastic BBQ as they grow up? If they want to go to college that much they can get a Job selling BBQ sandwiches and pay their own damn tuition.

Cape is right about the electrics for real low and real slow. Cant beat them.
 
paulthenurse said:
Go big or go home.

What's more important, paying for the Spawns college or the ability to make fantastic BBQ as they grow up? If they want to go to college that much they can get a Job selling BBQ sandwiches and pay their own damn tuition.

Cape is right about the electrics for real low and real slow. Cant beat them.
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But, isn't that close to cheating?
 
paulthenurse said:
I figured that was a given.

Hey Mike, did you sign up for the ride yet?
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I didn't yet, I may be doing a different ride, for pancreatic cancer. Hit home on this one. I haven't decided anything yet. I've been slacking on training too.
 
paulthenurse said:
WHAT?????? You haven't been out riding in the snow????? What a pant-load you are.

I HOPE to get my first ride of the year in this weekend. How much does that suck? I had 200+ miles logged in March last year.
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I have my trainer set up in the basement.
 
DakotaRules said:
How things been? You staying busy?
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Always. ;-(. In dc right now but heading home tomorrow night hopefully. Got a boy on the way in June. Yes it's mine. Yes I have been laid three times now. :)
 

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