I am an idiot

Yakima 728
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WesleyS said:
This thread must not die! If it reaches 600 posts I'll do something I thought I'd never do. I'll brew an......IPA! I am not a fan of IPAs, but when the 600 post mark is reached I'll brew a big ol fat flippin Double Black IPA!
Then I'll drink every last bit of it and be forced to love it.
And I'll post a video of me drinking it from the keg with a silly straw on the spinning teacups ride at a carnival!
Well maybe not that last part, but I'll brew the beer........minus turtles though.
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As a sign of solidarity, I too commit to brewing/cpnsuming an IPA should this thread reach 600 posts, however; mine shall be a literal Indian IPA containing some sort of typical Indian spices/ ingredients.

Furthermore, I see your 600 post IPA, and raise you a 1000 post open wild fermentation.
 
Circle of life stuff really. There is a ritual amongst my people. Every time a beer must be sacrificed, we give our respects. We take only what we need, and nothing is wasted. We offer the following words as thanks:

*I see you Brother, and thank you. Your spirit goes with Eywa. Your body stays behind to become part of The People.
 
Hamsterbite said:
As a sign of solidarity, I too commit to brewing/cpnsuming an IPA should this thread reach 600 posts, however; mine shall be a literal Indian IPA containing some sort of typical Indian spices/ ingredients.

Furthermore, I see your 600 post IPA, and raise you a 1000 post open wild fermentation.
Click to expand...

Awesome! Awesome to the max!
I'm all in! I'm already developing my recipe for the double black IPA should we reach 600. The name will include idiot or something of the like in honor of this thread. Next stop wild fermentation!
 
If only the ramblers would unit. The sacrifice could be repented. The worth of life is as a grindstone, ever turning.
 
Hamsterbite said:
Circle of life stuff really. There is a ritual amongst my people. Every time a beer must be sacrificed, we give our respects. We take only what we need, and nothing is wasted. We offer the following words as thanks:

*I see you Brother, and thank you. Your spirit goes with Eywa. Your body stays behind to become part of The People.
Click to expand...

I don't know about you, but I hate connecting the tentacles in my hair braid with the tentacles on my mash tun and fermenter. Star San kinda stings after a while.
 
Hamsterbite said:
How do I know when I've found the right mashtun?

It will try to kill you.

Outstanding.
Click to expand...

Whew.....that was a tough ritual. But to prove a point I had to abandon my original mash tun for a much larger one.
 
WesleyS said:
Awesome! Awesome to the max!
I'm all in! I'm already developing my recipe for the double black IPA should we reach 600. The name will include idiot or something of the like in honor of this thread. Next stop wild fermentation!
Click to expand...

That is all well and good, but we will need to know if you intend to use a 20 quart brew pot or a 5 gallon one. That is the heart of the issue here.
 
menerdari said:
A Double Black IPA in honor of Idiot? Nice :)
Wait !! that's me :confused:
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At least you can recognize yourself! :D

When people make fun of me, I am too stupid to notice. That is a major fail, I think. Of course, I'm also the person at the party saying, "What? I don't get it!" and then about two hours later I start laughing because it finally hits me. I'm very cute, but not terribly bright. :)
 
Bigcorona said:
That is all well and good, but we will need to know if you intend to use a 20 quart brew pot or a 5 gallon one. That is the heart of the issue here.
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Oh wait! Oh no! I don't know! I never thought I'd have to use math in the real world! Uh..............24.32!!!!!
 
Hamsterbite said:
How do I know when I've found the right mashtun?

It will try to kill you.

Outstanding.
Click to expand...

That's why I BIAB. I haven't met the mashtun I couldn't whup in a straight up fight. When they decide to cheat and pull a knife, I snatch out my turtle and give em two alligators between the giblets. F**K a mashtun!!
 
menerdari said:
A Double Black IPA in honor of Idiot? Nice :)
Wait !! that's me :confused:
Click to expand...

Hey, it's a compliment. I'm brewing a beer style I said I'd never brew in your honor.
 
Hamsterbite said:
Snip. . We offer the following words as thanks:

*I see you Brother, and thank you. Your spirit goes with Eywa. Your body stays behind to become part of The People.
Click to expand...
For me the spirit hits my head. The body hits the septic tank.
 
BrotherGrim said:
That's why I BIAB.
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OMG, I ripped a BFH in my BIAB! Do I ATMF or RDWHAHB? WTF do I do? I'm TM of a CA to BAN SB for my BIAB!
 
Under 180 posts until I brew the biggest, boldest, blackest SOB of an IPA this world has had the privilege, no, the honor to contain. A beer so dark and with such a hop bite that it's as if someone put out a lit hops cigarette on your tongue then made you chew it up. So bold, so foreign to your senses, that when the first sip hits your tongue you don't know whether to cry tears of joy or agony. As you ponder the deep layers of complexity that pierce your soul, like a dagger made of cascades and carafa, you're forced to question your very being and whether or not you ever truly lived before that moment. This beer could only be brewed by an idiot for an idiot, in honor of an idiot. DBIIPA- Double Black Idiotic India Pale Ale
 
WesleyS said:
Under 180 posts until I brew the biggest, boldest, blackest SOB of an IPA this world has had the privilege, no, the honor to contain. A beer so dark and with such a hop bite that it's as if someone put out a lit hops cigarette on your tongue then made you chew it up. So bold, so foreign to your senses, that when the first sip hits your tongue you don't know whether to cry tears of joy or agony. As you ponder the deep layers of complexity that pierce your soul, like a dagger made of cascades and carafa, you're forced to question your very being and whether or not you ever truly lived before that moment. This beer could only be brewed by an idiot for an idiot, in honor of an idiot. DBIIPA- Double Black Idiotic India Pale Ale
Click to expand...

Don't forget the oak chips.:D

Hmm, all this spirit talk reminds me. I have the soul of some hard cider sealed in a reliquary. I wonder if that would go well with bonemeal, blood, and mummified cat...
 
Yooper said:
I'm very cute, but not terribly bright. :)
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Cuteness is usually characterized by (though not limited to) some combination of infant-like physical traits, especially small body size with a disproportionately large head, large eyes, a pleasantly fair, though not necessarily small nose, dimples, and round and softer body features. Infantile personality traits, such as playfulness, fragility, helplessness, curiosity, innocence, affectionate behavior, and a need to be nurtured are also generally considered cute. (Wikipedia)

I thought I was "cute" until I read that. But my head is proportionate :p In Latin the word idiota ("ordinary person, layman") preceded the Late Latin meaning "uneducated or ignorant person."
I guess that makes me a non cute, ordinary, layman Idiot. :rockin:
 
Leadgolem said:
I wonder if you can be an ordained idiot...
Click to expand...

Yep. I ordain idiots for $450 (non-profit, just to take care of overhead). Interested?
 
We need a committee and a president of it if the poll votes in favor of us being idiots.
 
I'm an idiot.
But I'm sure everyone already figured that out.
 
Let your anger be as a monkey in a piñata... hiding amongst the candy... hoping the kids don't break through with the stick!

If you know what that's from, then you win!
What? You might ask. You win the knowledge that your an idiot like me.
 
WesleyS said:
Let your anger be as a monkey in a piñata... hiding amongst the candy... hoping the kids don't break through with the stick!

If you know what that's from, then you win!
What? You might ask. You win the knowledge that your an idiot like me.
Click to expand...

Kung Pow
 
WesleyS said:
OMG, I ripped a BFH in my BIAB! Do I ATMF or RDWHAHB? WTF do I do? I'm TM of a CA to BAN SB for my BIAB!
Click to expand...

Man just RDWHAHB! Tell that BFH to STFU! Plant a XXL Turtle in there to handle the blow-by crank the heat WFO jam some NIN and slam home a DIPA FTMFW!!
 
leftcontact said:
I put some windex on my turtle and it cleared the Pellicle right up.
Click to expand...

You did what? Seriously? Have you learned nothing? You're a disgrace and unfit to brew. Turn in your homebrewers badge and your hydrometer.
 

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