She wants my brewery

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amrmedic

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Ok, after you read this, you'll know why I am leaving her.

She is evil. She wants my homebrewery in the divorce. She doesnt brew, hates beer, and claimed my homebrewing hobby as an obsession which drove us to divorce. But she says since the household money paid for it, she is entitled to at least half of my rig and gear, but wants it all. Says after being exposed to it for so long, she thinks she may try it out.

I told her no and even gave her the dog. Still wont back down. Guess i'll leave it to the lawyers, and if need be, the judge. But I will not give up my brewery!
 
sell it to your friend for one dollar... that way she only gets 50 cents LOL. then buy it back for 2 dollar. its legal ask you lawyer!!
 
Well...she is evil. What did you expect? You actually probably have more invested in the dog which you gave to her. Initial purchase, shots, spaying, food, treats, toys, accessories, license, vet visits and many other things depending on how long you have had it. You really gave her much more, maybe you should take something else to compensate.
 
Let her have it, buy yourself a kick-ass new rig for your newfound bachelorhood, and then laugh your butt off as she fumbles around with the old gear and makes horrible, horrible beer.
 
No, the dog was her idea and all he does is crap and pee in the house and shed.
And about upgrading, well I wont be able to afford to after this mess with child support and everything. She only wants it as she knows it my source of happiness (besides my kids) and it is her duty to suck the very essence of my life and happiness out of me
 
No, the dog was her idea and all he does is crap and pee in the house and shed.
And about upgrading, well I wont be able to afford to after this mess with child support and everything. She only wants it as she knows it my source of happiness (besides my kids) and it is her duty to suck the very essence of my life and happiness out of me

Amrmedic, Life goes on. I can only imagine how all this feels for you. It is just a brew rig, do not let it get to you to much. This is just a phase, you will get over this and be even better than before. She is hopping you have this conversation and are miserable. Obviously she is bitter and rotting inside, do not follow suit! :mug:
 
I'm sure judges in family court see vindictive bullsh*t like this all the time. The non-golfing wife wants the golf clubs, the non-hunting wife wants all the rifles/shotguns, etc. I bet the judge will see this request for what it is and find a solution that lets you keep it.
 
This is horrible. Hope it all works out. If it was me I'd sell everything to a friend for $50 bucks. If you do get in trouble for that worst case scenario you have to buy it back and give it to her, which is what she's trying to do anyway.
 
sell it to your friend for one dollar... that way she only gets 50 cents LOL. then buy it back for 2 dollar. its legal ask you lawyer!!

this. sell it for a reasonable amount, pay half the cash and buy it back.

having been divorced, i'm sorry you're going through this - the only advice i could give (assuming you have no kids) is lawyer up and get very nasty very quickly.

you know why divorce is so expensive?

because it's worth it.
 
Nothing missing. She was jealous of anything I did that she wasnt a part of. I offered to include her, but she had no desire to brew with me. She is just a very petty woman who wants to hurt me any way she can, and that is by trying to get stuff I enjoy.
 
Just take the parts off of it and give it to her as a steel hunk and then build a new one. Or just sell the steel to a friend for $100 so she only gets $50 then buy it back from your friend for $100. Your friend makes a little money and your only out $50. Better then being out a couple thousand dollars and a brew rig.
 
Even if she gets it she is not going to brew with it. She will just sell it to piss you off. I can't believe nobody else has said this.
 
In my divorce, I was ordered not to sell any property at the first court appearance. I wasn't ordered not to use it though... Maybe a brew day gone wrong is in order if it looks like she's gonna win: break everything.

My Ex made really bad alcoholic claims and used my homebrewing as 'proof'. I spent a really fun year being treating like crap by work, the courts, people the courts ordererd me to speak to, etc. If I ever had the pleasure of seeing her in a bad situation, I'd be so happy my heart would probably explode.
 
JonM said:
I'm sure judges in family court see vindictive bullsh*t like this all the time. The non-golfing wife wants the golf clubs, the non-hunting wife wants all the rifles/shotguns, etc. I bet the judge will see this request for what it is and find a solution that lets you keep it.

From the guys I know that have been in similar situations... the judge usually picks up on crap like this and the divorce decree may shift in your favor.
 
Just give it to her. You'll save the money in lawyer fees. The judge will see what type of demands your wife is making and side with you and if nor you're screwed anyway :)
 
No, the dog was her idea and all he does is crap and pee in the house and shed.
And about upgrading, well I wont be able to afford to after this mess with child support and everything. She only wants it as she knows it my source of happiness (besides my kids) and it is her duty to suck the very essence of my life and happiness out of me

I know it doesn't really help, but I will tell you that you should thank your lucky stars you're getting a divorce. Trust me. I was married to somebody like that, about a hundred years ago. He didn't really want me to be happy, and was really upset that I was happy after the divorce. He did all kinds of things to my poor kids so that I would suffer, and that was the shame of it all. But when we got divorced and it was final, I could breathe again.

I know it sounds like an exaggeration, breathing again! But it is not. He absolutely suffocated me, tried to control my very thoughts, and actually hated me inside. I've never said a bad word about him to anyone, particularly my kids (now grown), but the day after the divorce I knew that I was now responsible for my own happiness and it's been a wonderful 15 years.

Sadly, he is still the same miserable excuse for a human being and he looks absolutely terrible. He's got a wife, who he married a few weeks after our divorce, who is also a miserable human being. They are wallowing through life together, both miserable people. I would feel so sorry for them if he didn't make my life hell for nearly 20 years (16 years of marriage, and 4 years of hurting my kids).

Anyway, my point is this- you deserve to be a whole human being and if it means giving up your brew rig so that she can feel "better" about being vindictive, let her! In fact, give her the grain mill too! As her if she wants the carboys, or anything else. I promise- just letting go of anything that binds you to her (except for those precious kids!) will make you feel better. "Sour grapes" are vinegar to those who want to hold onto them. Joyfully letting go will be easier for you in the long run, and even more painful for her. I swear.
 
veritas524 said:
From the guys I know that have been in similar situations... the judge usually picks up on crap like this and the divorce decree may shift in your favor.

Yep, happened that way with me. The judge didn't go for it one bit and forced a settlement in the courtroom where my ex had to back down on trying to take things that should clearly go to me.
 
brewmaster89 said:
Or just sell the steel to a friend for $100 so she only gets $50 then buy it back from your friend for $100. Your friend makes a little money and your only out $50.
How is the friend making money, out of curiousity?

The best advice I can give, is whatever happens do not let your wife suspect that anything that she does is bothering you. Tell her that while you were together that you did everything you could to be there for your children, by that marriage to her has been a nightmare, and no price is I great to be free of her wickedness. This will upset her to no end, the judge will begin to view her as vindictive and irrational, and things will start to go in your favor. Worst case you might need to scale back on the brewing, but this is a small price to pay when compared to a chance to be free of this type of person. It's a win-win situation for you.
 
I agree with a few of the others that her request won't be honored by the judge. I would just wait it out. If the judge allows you to keep it then that's great. If not, it's a small price to pay for peace and happiness. I got divorced 14 years ago, and I haven't remarried. I'm in Texas where divorce law usually works in the females favor, yet I ended up keeping everything including my daughter. I rasied her by myself ever since. The judge will see what is frivolous and vindictive and what is not!
 
Divorce sucks. It just does. And when children are involved, the suckitude never ends. Laws vary widely from state to state. But all it takes is one party in the divorce with a bitter and vindictive attitude to make every possible part of the process a living hell for as long as possible. I've been divorced for almost 20 years, and although much better, every contact with the other party is still turned into a nightmare.
 
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