The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

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It'll be more like he's wearing your right butt cheek as a hat and drinking blueberry beer outta your skull.

"Where's Paul? He's here don't worry…"
 
I accidentally showed up at the Yard House over by Fenway about an hour and a half ago. Solid beer list. TON of taps but not a ton of beers that blow you away. Their "house" beers are brewed by Firestone Walker and I just had their Amber. It didn't suck. Went with a Jack D'Or with my sushi and now going Nugget Nectar. They have the Duchesse but only in 750 bottles. Fckers.

Food is a lot better than I was expecting.
 
I'm pretty sure someone was murdered in our office bathroom over the weekend.

Went in to... uh, catch on up on some reading this morning, and the place had been cleaned. OVER-cleaned. Like, they used many gallons of bleach; the grout used to be fairly dark, now it's almost white. Like, someone got their throat cut, and the perp was a little too aggressive in cleaning up the mess. They NEVER clean the ****ter like that - something is amiss.

Anyone know where I can get some luminol?
 
the_bird said:
I'm pretty sure someone was murdered in our office bathroom over the weekend.

Went in to... uh, catch on up on some reading this morning, and the place had been cleaned. OVER-cleaned. Like, they used many gallons of bleach; the grout used to be fairly dark, now it's almost white. Like, someone got their throat cut, and the perp was a little too aggressive in cleaning up the mess. They NEVER clean the ****ter like that - something is amiss.

Anyone know where I can get some luminol?
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Someones been watching too many 'Quincy' reruns.
 
"Forensic Files." I always watch that right before going to bed; the_Wife gets a little perturbed at how often it's the spouse that's doing the murdering. Screaming "The husband did it!!" decidedly does NOT work to get her in the mood for nighttime activities.
 
Are you sure you weren't in the ladies room? I made that mistake at my last company. They had a series of duplicate buildings on campus. I always took a right to go into the men's restroom on my side of the building. First week at the lab on the other side of the building I was rushing to the bathroom and took a quick right. Sadly since the building were an exact mirror the men's room wasn't on the right. First I was freaked out by how clean it was (altho this is engineering so it probably never gets used), then I was even more shocked to find out that they had free condom machines on this side of the building: "What the hell is going on over on this side of the building that they're giving away conodoms?" Then it hit me when I notice there were no urinals and now realize that isn't a condom machine. I probably exited the place just as quick as I entered before anyone could scream and mace me.
 
Hey PTN... Fcknut... The keg rooms are right next to the bathrooms and they have the temp on a PID outside the door.. 38 degrees. And it was obvious that the Apt 12 was at that temp.

Cckface

Way way too cold.

Luckily I went to Deep Ellum after and and was able to get a proper pint.
If my maple habanero wings would show up now!!! They would go great with my Pretty Things Once Upon a Time.
 
Cape Brewing said:
Hey PTN... Fcknut... The keg rooms are right next to the bathrooms and they have the temp on a PID outside the door.. 38 degrees. And it was obvious that the Apt 12 was at that temp.

Cckface

Way way too cold.

Luckily I went to Deep Ellum after and and was able to get a proper pint.
If my maple habanero wings would show up now!!! They would go great with my Pretty Things Once Upon a Time.
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So the airtemp in the keg room was 38; but the temp didn't rise at all between lines, pouring, sitting around waiting to be taken to your table, etc.?

Admit it; you've a pocket thermometer in your pocket protector.
 
homebeerbrewer said:
Cape Brewing said:
Whatever. Yeager chased me around last year for the cash as if someone was holding his family hostage and he needed it for the ransom money.... Now I'm whining because I'm asking for my share? I think I've asked about 20 times and each time I get cricket noises.
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Hmm... I seem to get cricket noises when I ask about my share of the turbid mash lambic we did a couple years ago.
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I hear crickets again...
 
It's in the fckin' barrel. Do you want to pull your share out?

Tell me when you can come by with a carboy or bottles and take your share.

It's a lambic. It takes a while. But if you want your share, like I said, come get it.
 
No I haven't fckin bottled 45 gallons on my own. Are you are crack??

We pulled a half a effin pint off the barrel to try it and see where it was. And no, I didn't wait until you were gone. Someone mentioned it, we figured it was a good call to try it and see where it was so we pulled half a pint out.

You thought I fckin bottled 45 gallons solo an was keeping it all myself??
 
Rick he's lying he was selling me your share for nickels on the dollar. I picked up your share for $3! What a steal!
 
Cape Brewing said:
I accidentally showed up at the Yard House over by Fenway about an hour and a half ago. Solid beer list. TON of taps but not a ton of beers that blow you away. Their "house" beers are brewed by Firestone Walker and I just had their Amber. It didn't suck. Went with a Jack D'Or with my sushi and now going Nugget Nectar. They have the Duchesse but only in 750 bottles. Fckers.

Food is a lot better than I was expecting.
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pRETTY MUCH THE SAME AT THE yARD HOUSE IN dEDHAM AT LEGACY PLACE
 
That definately gets top line on the resume… Grammer Nazi on this thread.



When you're applying for the managers job at 'Arseholes R Us'

(FWIW I think either Rick or the Rook would qualified for the job even without that bit of resume polish.)


PTN
 
Just got Back from San Diego. Hit 5 Breweries, including Stone, Ballast Point, Mission, and Port/Lost Abbey. Did brewery tours at the first two - beers were great, tours were OK, not too informative. I got to Stone Brewery early on Sunday, April 1st, to get in on the first tour and then on to something else. Turns out that morning they were releasing 1 case of 2007 Russian Imperial Stout, so I was able to get one bottle of that as well. Beers out there are awesome - they have almost 50 breweries in the greater San Diego area, and a ton of brew bars that carry quite a few taps. I even was able to get a few bottles of these to bring home...

Pliney_elder2.jpg
 
nhwrecker said:
Just got Back from San Diego. Hit 5 Breweries, including Stone, Ballast Point, Mission, and Port/Lost Abbey. Did brewery tours at the first two - beers were great, tours were OK, not too informative. I got to Stone Brewery early on Sunday, April 1st, to get in on the first tour and then on to something else. Turns out that morning they were releasing 1 case of 2007 Russian Imperial Stout, so I was able to get one bottle of that as well. Beers out there are awesome - they have almost 50 breweries in the greater San Diego area, and a ton of brew bars that carry quite a few taps. I even was able to get a few bottles of these to bring home...
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I'm super jealous. My wife and daughter were just out in Portland and she tried to get me a bottle of Pliny but it was sold out everywhere. Of course, she did send me a picture of her out at a restaurant enjoying a bottle of it... that *****.

She DID get few a few bottles of Ninkasi, though!
 
modernlifeisANDY said:
I'm super jealous. My wife and daughter were just out in Portland and she tried to get me a bottle of Pliny but it was sold out everywhere. Of course, she did send me a picture of her out at a restaurant enjoying a bottle of it... that *****.

She DID get few a few bottles of Ninkasi, though!
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At least you wife would drink it, my wife would turn her head to it
 

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