Toilet Brewing/Jail Hooch

I've been recently inspired by a thread I can't find now but will link to later about "$8 Bush Beer". A simple way to make something maybe resembling beer out of ingredients found at a grocery store; malted milk, wheat bran, sugar or honey, some celestial relaxation tea that has hops (forget the name), and bakers yeast. I thought it was a fun experiment and might try a very small batch for the hell of it, but then decided it would be much more awesome if it was fermented in a toilet to go with the nasty jail hooch theme. I have two more months in South America before I'm back in the states with a place to experiment, but I'll be scouring the Chicago Craigslist for toilets until then (feel free to link me anything). I will of course be cleaning the hell out of it and use lots of starsan, and replacing anything too gross. I mean I already use a toilet connector hose in my MT so it can't be that much worse... right?

I was thinking for humor I would do two small batches, one in the bowl and the other in the top part open fermented with a fabric barrier to keep out the big bugs, then flush it all to my bottling bucket. If this all materializes videos will be posted and I'm sure there will be a long line for tastings...

I'm open for any suggestions, comments, naysayers, and bottle trades.

My only advise is DON'T DROP THE SOAP!

Seriously, though, a porcelin toilet is WAY more sanitary than a doorknob or a dollar bill or almost anything else you can think of. There was a study I read one time that concluded that the average TOILET at a McDonalds is cleaner, by bacteria count, than the ICE CUBES they serve with their drinks. MUCH cleaner.

Point being, porcelin doesn't harbor bacteria, which is why toilets are made out of porcelin. It'll clean up and sanatize much easier than even a SS kettle or plastic bucket.

Enjoy your hooch....and hold on to that soap!

While this is an interesting idea, I had really hoped that we could go more than one post without a "don't drop the soap" joke. I mean, is jail or prison rape really all that funny? #wecandobetter

wittmania said:

While this is an interesting idea, I had really hoped that we could go more than one post without a "don't drop the soap" joke. I mean, is jail or prison rape really all that funny? #wecandobetter

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Yes, it is funny

HAH, sweet... Are you actually planning on plumbing this thing to make the flushing work? If not, I hope you know you need to plug the hole on the bottom or you will not be fermenting in the bowl.

It might be a lot easier to gut the water tank and seal the drain. And for the bowl, screw the toilet onto some sheet metal with gasket material. These will mean you have to rack from the toilet but it sounds more feasible.

Toilets use 1-2 really thick and messy wax gaskets to form a seal on the floor so you might have to get creative to fill in all that space.

P.S. Just realized that flushing will more than likely oxidize the hell out of your beer anyway.

Consult the GAP thread. However most if not all of those experiments were found to be not good.

As far as toilets go...(I can't believe I actually typed that).. If you want authenticity you are going to have to find a stainless toilet. With all the tunnels in a used porcelain toilet it is going to take quite a bit of cleaning. Interior toilet tanks are usually porous and not smooth like the outside. The gaskets are also not good food grade either.

Just some things to think about.

+1

tom_gamer said:

yes, it is funny

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+1

In undergrad we kept a toilet on the porch that we would throw in a sixer and a bag of ice and hang outside. Made a nice cooler/seat and never got stolen unlike our lawn chairs Never brewed in it though, but party on man!

https://www.homebrewtalk.com/f39/inspiration-experimental-brew-303935/

The thread you were looking for.

Just ask me next time. I'm all-knowing.

I mean, is jail or prison rape really all that funny?

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Like so many other things in life (i.e., football to the groin, skateboarding accidents, bullet to the leg at the club, girl fights), it's HILARIOUS as long as it's not happening to you!

topherm said:

like so many other things in life (i.e., football to the groin, skateboarding accidents, bullet to the leg at the club, girl fights), it's hilarious as long as it's not happening to you! :d

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+1

joeychopps said:

+1

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+2

Cape Brewing said:

https://www.homebrewtalk.com/f39/inspiration-experimental-brew-303935/

The thread you were looking for.

Just ask me next time. I'm all-knowing.

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Awesome! But this is where the original inspiration came from: https://www.homebrewtalk.com/f39/8-wheat-bush-beer-267562/

Thanks for the advice so far and I understand the concern for food grade parts, but I'm really not that worried about my health. Live fast and die young! Ok maybe I'm kidding, but I will find a way to make this work at the expense of one terrible batch of beer, a little extra BHP than I'd like, and some poor helpless toilet. I was also thinking of using some olvatine as that seems to be the new trendy thing these days.

Any leads on that poor helpless toilet would be great, maybe I should post in the classifieds.

How 'bout just using a bucket... so you can avoid trying to find a toilet and then the whole... you know... drinking out of a toilet part.

just a thought.

Cape Brewing said:

How 'bout just using a bucket... so you can avoid trying to find a toilet and then the whole... you know... drinking out of a toilet part.

just a thought.

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That's not nearly as fun, but if I have to spend more than $10 on the project then it might happen. I'm not investing too much into something I know won't be good.

Trust me... more than most people I can appreciate the novelty aspect and I do a TON of stuff "for the fun of it".

... I'm just struggingly with "drinking from a toilet". I hear ya on the sanitation, blah blah blah.. but...

Now you're talking about "drinking from a toilet that i can get for $10 or less"...

I dunno...


How about making it in a bucket while you lock yourself in the bathroom or something... you can pretend you're in your cell!!

I found one for you....real cheap!!

Not to be a naysayer but my cousin is currently in prison and I had to ask about jail house hooch. He said nobody makes it in the toilet he said that's a garenteed way of getting caught. He said they ferment in plastic trash bags that they can hide under there mattress. Just my .02
Chopps

Malted milk? Ever hear of Kvass?

You should buy and dry a pound of pumpernickel ($2.00), boil it for 15 minutes and let it steep for 8 hours. Drain off the liquid, which will be slightly tasting of the bread, a little dark and sugary/starchy. Cheapest way to get a beer base from household items IMO.

corrections is my field. They do not actually make it in toilets. Plastic bottles for small batches. Trash bags for bigger batches.

bucfanmike said:

corrections is my field. They do not actually make it in toilets. Plastic bottles for small batches. Trash bags for bigger batches.

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Since you're the expert, prison rape; funny or no?

wittmania said:

While this is an interesting idea, I had really hoped that we could go more than one post without a "don't drop the soap" joke. I mean, is jail or prison rape really all that funny? #wecandobetter

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New meat here fishy fishy fishy

icanbenchurcat said:

Malted milk? Ever hear of Kvass?

You should buy and dry a pound of pumpernickel ($2.00), boil it for 15 minutes and let it steep for 8 hours. Drain off the liquid, which will be slightly tasting of the bread, a little dark and sugary/starchy. Cheapest way to get a beer base from household items IMO.

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How many gravity points does that add?

mcarb said:

Since you're the expert, prison rape; funny or no?

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Well this thread has been pretty funny and I hate to rain on your parade and get heavy, but it definitely is a pretty serious thing and our prison systems are pretty messed up right now. The whole privitization has got an insane amount of people in that shouldn't be and is forcing people into cycles of poverty and more criminal activity. The real problem facing families today behind loosing their homes in forclosure is loosing a parent for a bogus charge. I personally do have a friend who has been raped in prison and so I don't find it very funny, I always thought it was just something made up or extremely rare but it is a real issue because of the negligence of the state and borders on torture and certainly cruel punishment. I'm fine with making jokes about toilet beer, prison hooch, and whatnot, but as we don't really know eachother well enough on here to know if we've been affected by these circumstances it's probably best to leave out jokes concerning rape as it might be offensive or traumatically trigerring to somebody.

TheBreweryUnderground said:

How many gravity points does that add?

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A good amount of unfermentables, color and flavor. Balance with white sugar or raw sugar for abv.