Lame idea Thread

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traderearl

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Ok, this is basically going to get me flamed, but I just can't get the thought out of my head. If we are not making an all grain recipe then we are using DME or LME for base flavoring and sugar to turn into alcohol.

So............what if I just used 5 gallons of water and a bunch of sugar?!?!?!?!?!?!?! I am not asking this to replace DME/LME just a thought for like a really cheap, nasty, high alcohal B*stard of a "beer". Has anyone ever tried this, how BAD does it taste, will it work???? Or will it just be a waste of yeast, water and sugar?

Thanks for the public flogging beforehand.
 
traderearl said:
Ok, this is basically going to get me flamed, but I just can't get the thought out of my head. If we are not making an all grain recipe then we are using DME or LME for base flavoring and sugar to turn into alcohol.

So............what if I just used 5 gallons of water and a bunch of sugar?!?!?!?!?!?!?! I am not asking this to replace DME/LME just a thought for like a really cheap, nasty, high alcohal B*stard of a "beer". Has anyone ever tried this, how BAD does it taste, will it work???? Or will it just be a waste of yeast, water and sugar?

Thanks for the public flogging beforehand.

No public flogging for you...mainly because you were pretty humble about your question. But I will say this: if you decide to get all offended when people tell you the truth, then be prepared to get a real good flogging. It's happened before. Some eurotrash college punks came in here knowing pretty much nothing about brewing, and got terribly offended when people told them that their sugar-water-brew would not turn out very good at all, and that they should probably read up on brewing before trying again. It was not pretty. So, just fair warning. Not saying you'd do something like that, just letting you know.

Anyway...

All sugars are NOT created equal. There's a big difference, molecularly, between refined table sugar and malt extract. And when fermented, they produce vastly different products. Fermented table sugar will turn out to be a ghastly, ciderish, bland, disgusting monstrosity, I will assure you of that. You're better off just buying some aristocrat vodka if you're looking to get ****ed up.

And just to be clear...you shouldn't be relying only on DME/LME for your flavor. Grains will go a long way...extracts just aren't flavorful enough to do the job. A good rule of thumb is to use light extracts for the fermentable sugars, and use steeping or mashed grains for your flavor.
 
This subject has been beaten to death. Do a search and you should find some of the threads dealing with making hooch. Most of them have been started by college kids.
 
RichBrewer said:
This subject has been beaten to death. Do a search and you should find some of the threads dealing with making hooch. Most of them have been started by college kids.

Speaking of which...

Hey, Rich, we should really have a "Prison Hooch" section in the wiki. Class up the joint a bit, you know? :D
 
See this Thread for more ideas. Good luck and consider yourself Flogged!:D

Cheers
 
Go and praise the series of tubes we call the intarnets.

The day after the first brew was made in DIRT BC, a guy just like you was flogged.

We've come a long ways.
 
Thank you for being kind, I won't get offended because I already know some people are going to take this thread the wrong way. And this is not a recipe I would use to replace my 2 favorites right now.

Is there anything inexpensive that could be used in place of LME/DME for the conversion to sugars for the yeast? For instance, what about just using fruit (without this leading to someone saying just make wine) as their is a whole field of blackberries across the street from my house?

And in regards to the last part of your reply, I don't rely on DME for flavor the way I put it was base flavoring. Although I am really curious as to what just fermenting the DME would taste like. :)

Thanks again for being kind.
 
traderearl said:
Thank you for being kind, I won't get offended because I already know some people are going to take this thread the wrong way. And this is not a recipe I would use to replace my 2 favorites right now.

Is there anything inexpensive that could be used in place of LME/DME for the conversion to sugars for the yeast? For instance, what about just using fruit (without this leading to someone saying just make wine) as their is a whole field of blackberries across the street from my house?

And in regards to the last part of your reply, I don't rely on DME for flavor the way I put it was base flavoring. Although I am really curious as to what just fermenting the DME would taste like. :)

Thanks again for being kind.

No problem, dude...what you're attempting to do, more commonly referred to as "prison hooch", is a regular subject around here...mainly because a lot of newcomers are curious about it.

The sugars in fruit are configured similarly to cane sugar, and will produce similar weird brews in high enough quantities. Anything with a large proportion of cane sugar or fruit sugar is going to taste...weird. Your best bet on sugars is Belgian candi sugar and dextrose (corn sugar). But even with those, the higher you get, the weirder it's going to taste.
 
LMAO, oh boy, I couldn't make it through more than a page of some of the other threads, I am now really suprised I didn't get flogged with a cat of nines. I guess I did not make it out enough in college enough to know what hooch and pruno were.

BTW, I am not a 16 year old trying to brew budweiser under my bed, and I have finished most of "the Complete Joy of Homebrewing" so I think I have most of the basics down (not saying I am an expert).

Just trying to find a basic, inexpensive, high alcohol, won't cause braindamage or make you go blind drink.
 
Evan! said:
Speaking of which...

Hey, Rich, we should really have a "Prison Hooch" section in the wiki. Class up the joint a bit, you know? :D
Great idea but can the prisoners get to the internet?

I can see the topics now:

How to sanitize your toilet bowl for a clean fermentation...
Will bread mold ferment my apple juice?
How to smuggle yeast into prison in various body cavities...:D
 
Sounds like if someone were trying to do what I am talking about then maybe they should just get a distiller kit and make liquor. :) But that is just someone else.
 
RichBrewer said:
Great idea but can the prisoners get to the internet?

I can see the topics now:

How to sanitize your toilet bowl for a clean fermentation...
Will bread mold ferment my apple juice?
How to smuggle yeast into prison in various body cavities...:D

I suppose we'd have to rely on ex-cons for our info. But college kids 'round the world would rejoice...
 
Yes. If you want a good buzz for cheap, it's hard to beat EdWort's Apfelwein.

Montrachet yeast $1.25
5 gallons of apple juice (no preservatives- apple juice, apple juice from concentrate, ascorbic acid, and pasteurized apple juice being the only acceptable ingredients)- $3 per gallon

3 cans of apple juice from concentrate (same no preservatives as above)- $1.99 per can

2.5 gallons of dextrose (corn sugar) $2.50 at LHBS


That's about it. Put it into a carboy and wait about 3 months for it to clear.
 
traderearl- why bother messing with high alcohol hooch? Just make some beer. 5 gallons of beer (54 bottles) will get you more than smashed, and it'll taste better getting there too.
 
mward said:
traderearl- why bother messing with high alcohol hooch? Just make some beer. 5 gallons of beer (54 bottles) will get you more than smashed, and it'll taste better getting there too.

Yeah, I'll have to second that one...


Stick to Beer, Mead, Cider, and Wine.... The real thing.... I tried to make some Pineapple Wine (edwort style) and it didn't turn out well, and i tried to make some hard lemonade... it turned into lemon juice and alcohol...
 
mward said:
traderearl- why bother messing with high alcohol hooch? Just make some beer. 5 gallons of beer (54 bottles) will get you more than smashed, and it'll taste better getting there too.


I am already doing that too.
 
DeadYetiBrew said:
Yeah, I'll have to second that one...


Stick to Beer, Mead, Cider, and Wine.... The real thing.... I tried to make some Pineapple Wine (edwort style) and it didn't turn out well, and i tried to make some hard lemonade... it turned into lemon juice and alcohol...


I guess I am just feeling adventurous, if no one ever tried anything we would not have such a wide variety of good beers, wines, and "other". I did not realize what I was talking about was hooch or pruno and that it was such a topic of disdain or I would have never posted it. But hey for every stupid thing I do I am that much closer to a good thing. And who knows, I may still try it just for the sake of experimentation.
 
I uh, heard of a guy that, uh, fermented the sugar and water you're talking about and then distilled it into 180 proof 'whiskey'. Ten pounds of sugar to five gallons of water would make what was referred to as a thin mash, then it was double or triple distilled and then charcoal filtered. Still had kind of a yucky yeasty flavour but it got the job done.

Now I'm not advocating doing anything illegal like my friend did, but I think drinking the original thin mash as opposed to the final product would be a little more palatable. He liked to mix it with frozen fruit juices.

By the way, that guy makes beer now and loves it. I don't think he's going to make any more hooch now that he can brew large quantities of really good beer.
 
traderearl said:
Is there anything inexpensive that could be used in place of LME/DME for the conversion to sugars for the yeast? For instance, what about just using fruit (without this leading to someone saying just make wine) as their is a whole field of blackberries across the street from my house?
Beer is fermented sugars from grains. Wine is fermented sugars from fruits. So if you use primarily fruit for your sugars you are going to get wine. If you have a large inexpensive/free supply of fruit then you can make some wine cheaply that will probably be pretty good. Most fruit wine recipes I have seen use fruit, sugar and some small adjuncts. You can even make it a lighter bodied wine and carbonate it if you prefer more of a wine cooler.
Fermenting sugar without distillation sounds like a pretty gross beverage. What flavors are you going to have in the beverage? yeast and alcohol!
Craig
 
if you ferment a bunch of brown sugar with champagne yeast then distill that you get some rum.
 
The apfelwein is by far the most delicious drinkable cheap buzz going.

5 gal applejuice (1/2 gal at shoprite on sale $99 each) x 10 = $10.
2 lbs dextrose $2
Montrachet yeast $1.25

That's $13.25 and can easily get you smashed daily for about a month.
 
Yeah I was going to try the Kilyu recipe and went into my local homebrew shop and the guy just talked me into making some wine as it is basically fruit, sugar, water, and yeast. So I bought a bunch of ripe honeydew melons and started a batch of that along side of some more beer. I always saw the wine kits at like around $80 so I never really considered that an option right now but with the recipe I just made it was only like $15. Once I get enough blackberries (20lbs) from the bushes across the street I will try some blackberry wine and that will only run me about $5-$7 per 5 gallons. So I figure if I can make wine that cheap why bother with any of the nasties. I think for my next beer I will try making the cherries in the snow recipe from the Complete Joy of Homebrewing and then brew my 3 normal beer recipes (Mac & Jack African amber clone, Oatmeal stout, & Ginger beer). So I now realize the complete lameness of the original idea I posted in this thread, however if I had not posted it I probably would have not found how inexpensive wine can be which allows me to brew the more expensive occasional brews.
 
traderearl said:
Ok, this is basically going to get me flamed, but ........what if I just used 5 gallons of water and a bunch of sugar?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

I read through a lot of the replies and didn't get an answer to this guys question. Would you basically end up with a yeasty ethanol flavored water?
 
gyrfalcon said:
I read through a lot of the replies and didn't get an answer to this guys question. Would you basically end up with a yeasty ethanol flavored water?
Yep!
What's the flavor in this brew? Answer, not really anything. That means the yeast and alcohol will be the primary flavors. Very unbalanced unless you are trying to distill for fuel.
Craig
 
What are the malt beverages like Mike's Hard Cranberry made from?

What about doing something like that?

- WW
 
wilsonwj said:
What are the malt beverages like Mike's Hard Cranberry made from?

What about doing something like that?

- WW
My understanding is Mike's are malt beverages. Which mean they take malted grains, add additional enzymes to more completely break down the starches and unfermentable sugars. This mixture is then fermented and filtered then back sweetened, flavored and carbonated.
If you want to replicate Mike's add vodka to your favorite non-alcoholic drink.

Craig
 
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