Favorite line from a TV show

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Cromwell

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What's a favorite line? Mine all tend towards comedy, but whatever you like.
Doesn't have to be the best line of all time, just one that you thought was great.

 
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Too many to quote, but here's a beer-related one from Cheers:

Norm: "Women...you can't live with 'em...pass the beer nuts"
 
Tobias Funke in arrested development:

I shot my wad a bit prematurely on what was supposed to be a dry run, if you will. Now I'm left with a bit of a sticky mess on my hands.
 
Peter Griffin in very drunken voice while naked: Lois! Every time we go to a hotel you hide the mini bar key from me. But I found it! (Whispering) I found it!
 
Bender, on being invited to a poker night: "Nah, I only play cards with chumps."
Fry: "I'll play."
Bender: "I'M IN!!!!"
 
Or ...
Zoidberg on seeing that Bender has stolen "The Last Supper" painting:

"Jesus Christ! ... And his twelve apostles!"
 
It's not a "line" so much, but one of the great moments for me in Futurama was this one.
 
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I've seen a few from Futurama, so here's my favorite:

While at the dog (horse?) track:

Announcer: And it's a dead heat! They're checking the electron microscope. The winner is... number 3 in a quantum finish!"
Professor Farnsworth: No fair! You changed the outcome by measuring it.
 
A bureaucrat opens Bender's locker. It's empty except for a single hex nut. She picks it up and glares at Bender. He looks at the floor and says "... Sometimes a guy gets lonely."
 
Simpsons.
Marge goes into the attic to see patty and selma in a pentagram on the floor.
she asks " Why are you worshipping the devil?"
They reply." There is nothing good on Television."
 
Here's to feelin' good all the time...
 
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"Wait!..what?" Mark Lily's clone is taught 2 words that come out perfectly as Twain (see avatar) doublecrosses him and beheads him.

[ame]www.youtube.com/watch?v=LVcf2NGs8vw[/ame]
 
hamiltont said:
How Sweeeet it is! You ol' farts will know who it is... ;)
Click to expand...

Reminds me of a joke in the Onion about what things would be part of a moon base. One was the Alice Kramden Memorial Domestic Abuse Shelter.
 
Archie Bunker talking about female Soviet olympic athletes - "I think some of them have more hismones than hormones."
 
So many on the Simpsons, but here's one of my favorites:

Marge : All right, all right, now, you're over stimulated. Let's get some beer in you and then it's right to bed.
Homer : Woo hoo! Beer, beer, beer, bed, bed, bed!
 
Marge: "Homer, would you rather have beer or eternal contentment?"
Homer: "Uhhhh, what kind of beer?"
 
Cheers bar: "Norm!"

Woody: "Hey Mr. Peterson. There's a cold one waitin' for ya."

Norm: "I know. And when she calls tell her I'm not here."
 
Duncan: "I am Duncan MacLeod of the Clan MacLeod"
Darius: "I'm Darius, and you won't be needing that *points with his eyes to Duncan's drawn sword*"
 
again from cheers - although Futurama has a lot of good ones, still on a home brew forum...

Norm:"You don't leave the one you love, you know what I love Sammy?"
Sam:"Beer? Norm"
Norm checks his watch "Sure, I got time." has some beer "I love that bar stool."

Cheers!
 
Tony Hancock in "The Blood Donor"


Hancock: How much do you want then?

Doctor: Well, a pint, of course?

Hancock: A pint? Have you gone raving mad? [...] I mean, I came here in all good faith, to help my country. I don't mind giving a reasonable amount, but a pint? Why, that's very nearly an armful!
 
Drama- The Wire, Frank Sobotka: "You know what the trouble is, Brucey? We used to make **** in this country, build ****. Now we just put our hand in the next guy's pocket. "

Comedy, gonna have to think, so many.
 
Nope, got it.

Family Guy, two dike lesbians walk into the local sperm bank and up to the information desk.

Attendant: "May I help you?"

Diesel Bull: "yeah, we'd like an applicator that looks like Jodie Foster's fist."
 
"I'm cool dad. Thats my thang. I'm hip. I surf the web. I text. LOL: laugh out loud. OMG: oh my god, WTF: why the face." - Phil Dunfy, Modern Family.
 

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