Why do my brew days never, ever go according to plan?!

DAGHALHGALGHLAHGLAHALHALAHLAAHLHA!!!!!!!

I feel your pain! What happened this time? Stuck sparge? Dog drop his stick in the fermenter before you could close it?

Brain fart after brain fart. Nothing went wrong...I just thought it did, so then I took corrective action. I wondered why as I prepared for boil, I only had 1.024 OG. DUH! It's because the mash wash 142 degrees...which translates to 1.040 OG - I was aiming for 1.039...instead I added DME to bring it up like a f tard.

That's just the tip of the iceberg right now, cause it ain't over lol! Had to get me a big glass of my brown ale that came out darn near perfect to remember why I put up with this crazy hobby!

I'm also getting used to my new kettle - which has the 5500w element used in the electric brewery. Good grief....it starts off slow, but once it's hot, that thing will have a ton of water boiling before you know it.

Which brings me to problem number two. Somehow, I ended up with 3.2g...and was supposed to have 4.75...so I added some more water, threw the hops back in sinc e they only got about 40min max in the boil (which clogged the 809 earlier because I was too dumb to use a hop bag).

What a night lol!

Sounds like you are drinking too much while you are brewing. Or over analyzing things.

RDWHAHB

And the icing on the cake. I didn't realize until 8:30 this morning that I didn't fill the air lock on the carboy

WHAT a brew day...

Thanks! Makes my forgetting to reset the gap on my crusher last weekend seem trivial in comparison! Spent about 2 hours taking it apart and relubing it and looking for issues before I remembered that I'd screwed with it trying to crush grapes.

At least my young daughter learned some new vocabluary.

No, wait. That's not a good thing.