The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

SSBrew - 728
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Dude... SSBC holiday pahty... Membahs only dog. You wanna drop the 25 beans fo' annual dues and you're in!

I fought the club on letting PTN in and they figured it was worth the dues. They ain't makin that mistake again.
 
paulthenurse said:
Nope. Schedule conflict. We flipped a coin, I lost.
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I'm freakin pissed! You suck! Man up dude; do your wife, pull the bag off, and get your ass to the party. Not that I want to see just you, but I want to see a good "bird fight" between you and cape. Wings wide and feathers puffed, strutting around in a room talkin about your cidah, how clear and watery your pilsner is and how great Ani De Lesbo is.
 
Life is about choices.

We've got two invites for that night, the SSBC Xmas bash and Alices boss's party. The last time we went to his house he took us down to his cellar where he had previously decanted a 1986 Chateau Figeac St Emilion Grand Cru and a 1986 Margaux Chateau Palmer.

At last years Christmas party Robnoxious threw up on my shoes.

It's a pretty easy decision.
 
Cape Brewing said:
And no... why would be want to increase the brett activity?? (since there hopefully isn't any brett IN it.)
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I wrote Vinnie and asked him about the brett in the consecration and he said that there is brett in the barrels. I thought I was going crazy and nope I'm not. He gave me the entire process and no I won't share.
 
Ethical dilemma...

You are at a bar for lunch. The bartender is smokin' hot.

She is also startlingly stupid. Unbelievably stupid. Indescribably stupid! Mind blowingly stupid!


Do I just gaze upon the wonder that is her hot body, eat my ribs and leave, or do I kill her before she gets knocked up and further muddies up the visibility in the gene pool?

I'm of an age where I know that no matter how witty, rich, or well hung I may be she's not going to throw me a go, not even a charity go, so I can take the long view and do what is right for the species.
 
Paulie texted me the picture.

Unconvincing_transvestite.jpg


Meh. To each his own.
 
the_bird said:
The good news is you can bang her all you want, you ain't going to get her pregnant. Plus, it's all blowjobs and anal.
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Paul's giggling and sayin "Ya I know bird, been hangin out all day with it!"
 
paulthenurse said:
She got 1/3 of the way thru pouring a #9 when the keg kicked. She asked if I wanted a Bud cause it was going to be a while till she got to change the keg.


I don't throw around terms like 'indescribably stupid' for no reason.
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Dude.

You were drinking a #9?

No wonder she offered you a Bud; what's the real difference, ****ty Beer A or ****ty Beer B, just ****ty Beer B has fake apricot.

I thought I knew you.

#9? REALLY?

Wow.
 
the_bird said:
Dude.

You were drinking a #9?

No wonder she offered you a Bud; what's the real difference, ****ty Beer A or ****ty Beer B, just ****ty Beer B has fake apricot.

I thought I knew you.

#9? REALLY?

Wow.
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That's a big +1!
 
He does T-day a day earlier than the rest of us, something about Ramadan and the Druid calendar. Do yourself a favor snd don't go there.



So I'm sitting at a bar alone chatting with these two girls.

(I have to work tomorrow, the_wife headed to NJ, her family all goes to her mothers but her mom us 85 and can't handle cooking a turkey dinner, so Al is the cook.)

And these two girls are telling me how they both can walk on their hands.

"Really? How far can you go?"

"Across this bar."

"No way!"

"Put your money where your mouth is."

"$20 if you both walk on your hands all the way across the bar."

5 minutes later there are 10 of us in the bet.




Farkin A if they didn't make it!!! The bar has to be 40 feet and these two walk on their hands the whole way.

So the only reasonable thing to do at that point is to go double or nuttin'


Best $40 I've spent in a while.
 
Oh my God!!!! I just walked outside my building and there were nine super hot lesbians, butt neked all totally goin' at it like they were filming a porno!!! It was CRAZY!!! I didn't see any cameras so I don't know what was going on. I sat and watched for like an hour. I can't believe the police didn't break it up, but nope! Hot naked lesbians... RIGHT out front of my building!

I totally forgot to take a pic though... sorry... next time.
 

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