My girlfriend. Help bring her to the good side of the Force

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Here's the lowdown:

I have tried having her taste several different styles, but she still says it tastes like beer. I know she doesn't like hoppy beers. She will drink a few bottles of a Kolsch that I brewed, but that is about it. Are there any suggestions as to how to ease a non beer drinker/appreciator into a beer drinker. She is good about helping brew, but that is just to be nice. I would really like her to experience and appreciate the final product. How can I get a reluctant beer drinker on the "Good Path"?
 
Why don't you take her to some good beer bars and let her try some different styles. Then when you find something she likes, make it. There is more out there than APA and Kolsch.
 
i would suggest really fruity wheat beers - lots of different varieties out there to choose from and they just taste like fruit for the most part.
 
I find belgian style beers are easier to transition with. If that doesn't work you could always try sour beer. It would probably be different than any other beer she's had.
 
Some people just don't like beer. I know that we find it hard to believe, but it's true!

I guess I can understand. I hate NASCAR. Someone who wanted me to change my ways and see the light (and I won't mention which member of my family took this upon themselves) only succeeded in making me hate it all the more by trying to show me the error of my ways.

Wine snobs are even worse. I love wine, but after listening to "wine experts" I want to give it up forever.

My advice, contrary to every one else's I'm sure, is to let her be. If she likes the kolsch, great! If she helps you brew, wonderful! Then she loves you and respects your hobby. So, stop trying to convert her to your way of thinking. Maybe, eventually, she'll want to try some different beers. But being "forced" to won't get you anywhere.
 
YooperBrew: Advice received and appreciated. I am with you on the NASCAR thing. I am not trying to change her as much as have her (kinda) be as excited as I am about this great hobby, and partaking in the fruit of its efforts. I am starting to hear grumbles about all the "beer stuff" I read and the beer related discussions that seem to keep popping up into every discussion. So, if she appreciates the stuff, just think of the great relationship we would strengthen. Beer Brewing = Love.
 
YooperBrew: Advice received and appreciated. I am with you on the NASCAR thing. I am not trying to change her as much as have her (kinda) be as excited as I am about this great hobby, and partaking in the fruit of its efforts. I am starting to hear grumbles about all the "beer stuff" I read and the beer related discussions that seem to keep popping up into every discussion. So, if she appreciates the stuff, just think of the great relationship we would strengthen. Beer Brewing = Love.

Maybe. I'm no relationship expert, but consider this. What if her passion was quilting? What if she LOVED quilting and making quilts more than any other hobby. Now, you like them ok, and can appreciate them as "nice", but you can really appreciate how much she loves it. Now, assume she decides that YOU should be as excited as she is about this great hobby (your words), and starts to talk constantly about quilting, and its history, and how important it is. Not only expecting you to hang the quilts, but to appreciate them as much as she does.

Now, I realize that isn't a great analogy, but I think everyone gets what I'm saying. The hobby IS wonderful, and brewing is my obsession. Bob drinks my beer with gusto (even starting to become a hophead, finally) but I certainly can't push him or encourage him to love brewing. He doesn't like all beer styles, but he drinks more of them than he used to. He won't touch a stout, an imperial anything, or an oaked beer. He doesn't brew, doesn't enjoy talking about brewing, and doesn't help with brewing. Because it's MY hobby. If he handed me a shovel (gardening is HIS hobby), I'd get pissed.

I'm all about supporting your life partner. But I'm pricklish about trying to get them excited about a hobby that they lovingly tolerate.
 
Clone Hacker Pschorr... put some raspberry syrup in the glass and squeeze some lemon in... also rub the lemon around the rim. If she doesn't like that there is no hope for her!
 
Your sage words of advice are appreciated and you are right. I see many posts regarding partners that are less than supportive. She is great with my brewing and I am appreciative. If she gets it, she gets it, at least she is supportive. You are right!
Thanks
 
does she drink/ like coffee? if so have her try a coffee stout or a chocolate stout. i've had pretty good success introducing those styles to women. maybe try a nice porter. not every woman likes light fruity beers.
 
Maybe. I'm no relationship expert, but consider this. What if her passion was quilting? What if she LOVED quilting and making quilts more than any other hobby. Now, you like them ok, and can appreciate them as "nice", but you can really appreciate how much she loves it. Now, assume she decides that YOU should be as excited as she is about this great hobby (your words), and starts to talk constantly about quilting, and its history, and how important it is. Not only expecting you to hang the quilts, but to appreciate them as much as she does.

Belgian Quilting Ale......Brilliant ! :D

Seriously though, Yooper is dead nuts correct. You might try a nice Wit with some orange or other fruit, or maybe some mead or wine, but if it isn't her thing, than it isn't her thing. Just enjoy the fact that she cares enough to participate.
 
I gotta agree with what Yooper said above, but you should try to convert her for a little bit at least ;) I'd second the idea of going to a brewery or something and getting a sampler of styles she can try. I think american wheats, belgian white, witbier, fruit beers, sours, are all good suggestions. If you can find a commercial beer she likes beforehand it will make it a lot easier, but it takes a bit of the magic out of it. I would also recommend a bavarian hefeweizen. It has very different flavor and aroma than other beers and has no hop presence. It is a very good entry level beer. Really intense dark beers like Stout and Porters (maybe even coffee ones) are another extreme and she might be into those, or something very malty like a Doppelbock or Scottish Ale.
 
Some people just don't like beer. I know that we find it hard to believe, but it's true!

I guess I can understand. I hate NASCAR. Someone who wanted me to change my ways and see the light (and I won't mention which member of my family took this upon themselves) only succeeded in making me hate it all the more by trying to show me the error of my ways.

Wine snobs are even worse. I love wine, but after listening to "wine experts" I want to give it up forever.

My advice, contrary to every one else's I'm sure, is to let her be. If she likes the kolsch, great! If she helps you brew, wonderful! Then she loves you and respects your hobby. So, stop trying to convert her to your way of thinking. Maybe, eventually, she'll want to try some different beers. But being "forced" to won't get you anywhere.


Yep....I'm that away about most hard liquors. I love beer and like some wines but I detest the majority of hard liquor I try. You could serve me 20 year old scotch that was aged in barrels that were made from the trees of Mount Olympus and it would still taste like pregnant porcupine piss to me and no one can change my opinion about that.

My wife will take a sip or two of my beer from my glass and offer a quick critique and I'm happy with that. I usually get her praise but she leaves the lion's share for me to enjoy.
 
I must say, reading this thread is quite interesting. My wife is extremely supportive of my hobby. Asks me about how things are going as far the beers that are fermenting, or sitting in bottles conditioning and carbing. She even likes to ask me about the taste of the beers I've brewed. She shows genuine excitement with each step and even helps brew if she is here when I brew (she is a nurse working nights) and helps me bottle. HOWEVER, she steadfastly refuses to drink anything I make. I don't take it as an insult. She just doesn't drink beer. She doesn't drink anything with carbonation. When I say anything, I mean anything. Her drink of choice is sweet tea. Lemonade every now and then and if she is going to have an alcoholic drink it's usually a mixed vodka drink of some sort. She loves to comment about how good the beers smell, and loves smelling the wort as I'm brewing, and the smell of the hops. But I'll never see the day when she drinks it. Like I said, as supportive as she is with this hobby of mine, it doesn't even bother me at all. For each beer I brew that she doesn't drink, is just one more i can. :mug:
 
i must say, reading this thread is quite interesting. My wife is extremely supportive of my hobby. Asks me about how things are going as far the beers that are fermenting, or sitting in bottles conditioning and carbing. She even likes to ask me about the taste of the beers i've brewed. She shows genuine excitement with each step and even helps brew if she is here when i brew (she is a nurse working nights) and helps me bottle. However, she steadfastly refuses to drink anything i make. I don't take it as an insult. She just doesn't drink beer. She doesn't drink anything with carbonation. When i say anything, i mean anything. Her drink of choice is sweet tea. Lemonade every now and then and if she is going to have an alcoholic drink it's usually a mixed vodka drink of some sort. She loves to comment about how good the beers smell, and loves smelling the wort as i'm brewing, and the smell of the hops. But i'll never see the day when she drinks it. Like i said, as supportive as she is with this hobby of mine, it doesn't even bother me at all. For each beer i brew that she doesn't drink, is just one more i can. :mug:

keeper.



8910
 
My wife hates almost all beer, the only think I could get her to actually drink was a Frambois. That being said, I keep a keg of cider on tap, and it keeps her happy...
 
Let her drink what she wants fer cryin' out loud. Why does every homebrewer, especially new ones, try to convert their spouse/girlfriend?
 
If she doesn't like beer, then simply she doesn't like beer.

Does she like wine?
If she is complaining on the 'brewing stuff' pick up a wine kit and 'brew' that with her. Assuming she likes it, she will have a product that she appreciates and you can justify the 'brewing stuff'.
 
If she doesn't like beer, then simply she doesn't like beer.

Does she like wine?
If she is complaining on the 'brewing stuff' pick up a wine kit and 'brew' that with her. Assuming she likes it, she will have a product that she appreciates and you can justify the 'brewing stuff'.

This is what I was going to suggest. If she's not a beer drinker than she's not going to turn overnight. Maybe one day in the future without you saying try this one she may ask if she can try it herself.

My gf started out not wanting anything to do with the process. She'd go sit in the other room and watch TV while I did it so I try to do it when she's not home. Turns out on Sunday she got home for the end of one and wanted to do the yeast herself. I'd like her to be my brewing partner but it's not going to happen, she doesn't like the smell of the hops. I take what I can get and she tries pretty much every beer I brew, I'd still call myself lucky.
 
Start her on Lindemann's. It's super sweet and every chick I know just loves it.

Then work on Saisons, maybe flavored at first, then work to the dry kind.

Then maybe some wheat/wit beers.

I've turned a BMC drinker into loving homebrew with a simple Saison.
 
My wife likes Stouts and, most recently, rasberry lambics. The lambics just taste like fruit juice with a little alcohol to me.
 
Yooper's right. Leave her be and don't get all pushy. I doubt she finds the notion that she's broken because she doesn't like beer very flattering.
 
Not to beat a dead horse, but I am with Yooper on this and like ahave's suggestion of making something else. I was going to suggest wine as well, but what about apfelwien or a hard cider? If she like that, make her that instead.

My GF is interested and tries all my beers but only likes a few. I am luck in that sense i guess.
 
I would have to disagree with most of the advice given on this thread. When I found out that my wife (gf at the time) didn’t like beer (Shocked!) I decided to take an unorthodox approach to the problem. Everyone wants to say “give her framboise, or a kolsch or a fruity hef and if she doesn’t like that rought go to the other extreme and try a coffee porter”. I’m sorry but this is the advice of the ignorant and inexperienced (no offence).

What you want to do (I personally know this works) is take the meanest IIPA you can find fill a baptistery with it and submerge you unwilling wife in it. At first it sounds extreme but look at the task at hand. I do have to warn you this rout might affect other aspects of her life, mine just sits in bed wrapped in the sheets and kind of shakes but at least she’ll drink an imperial now.
 
I would have to disagree with most of the advice given on this thread. When I found out that my wife (gf at the time) didn’t like beer (Shocked!) I decided to take an unorthodox approach to the problem. Everyone wants to say “give her framboise, or a kolsch or a fruity hef and if she doesn’t like that rought go to the other extreme and try a coffee porter”. I’m sorry but this is the advice of the ignorant and inexperienced (no offence).

What you want to do (I personally know this works) is take the meanest IIPA you can find fill a baptistery with it and submerge you unwilling wife in it. At first it sounds extreme but look at the task at hand. I do have to warn you this rout might affect other aspects of her life, mine just sits in bed wrapped in the sheets and kind of shakes but at least she’ll drink an imperial now.

This approach sounds promising..."the beatings will continue until morale improves."

I'm in a similar situation to most here. The lady friend likes Blue Moon and not much else, and although I don't think she's ever tried it, I'm willing to bet money that if I gave her an IPA she'd ask me how I could enjoy the taste of such a thing. If you're dead set on getting her into beer, my approach has been to brew what I think I'll like, and let her try it. Usually, I'm left with 45-50 bottles minus one sip...not the worst problem in the world to have.
 
Try experimenting with Fruit beer... If that doesnt work theres always Wine or Cider. I just opened up a bottle of Cyser my friend made and my girlfriend is absolutely in love with it. She even ordered a kit for me to make without telling me.
 
A couple months ago I set out to try and brew a session strength cider just out of some apple juice. I wasn't really making it for anyone but when the girlfriend got hold of it she took to it like white on rice. Normally she may have a beer or two but just about killed a 2 liter of the cider the first time she tried it.

Hey, it's a lot easier to make than beer. It was just apple juice fermented with ale yeast, then stabilized and back sweetened with 2 cans of apple concentrate before force carbing.
 
How can I get a reluctant beer drinker on the "Good Path"?

I dunno, but if you figure it out, let me know...

The closer the beer is to water, the more SWMBO likes it. She dislikes hops and malt and if it has any color whatsoever, she is automatically opposed to it.
 
What you want to do (I personally know this works) is take the meanest IIPA you can find fill a baptistery with it and submerge you unwilling wife in it. At first it sounds extreme but look at the task at hand. I do have to warn you this rout might affect other aspects of her life, mine just sits in bed wrapped in the sheets and kind of shakes but at least she’ll drink an imperial now.

LOL! I had to keep myself from bursting too loudly at work when I read that! I just brewed an IIPA on Friday. I wonder if I could actually get SWMBO to drink a glass with me...
 
I'm surprised with the number of people suggesting easing her into it or trying to suggest different beers until she finds one she likes. This is a recipe for disaster and resentment if you don't buffer it by sharing that you like the idea of a hobby you two can enjoy together.

This comment from OP says it all: "I am starting to hear grumbles about all the "beer stuff" I read and the beer related discussions that seem to keep popping up into every discussion."

I know you're passionate about your hobby, but if she's grumbling about how much it's coming up in your conversations then you're just laying it on too thick. Back off, enjoy your hobby and try to find something else you two can do together. I brew at night when my wife goes to bed for this very reason. It's a time consuming process that takes constant attention (meaning, attention away from her) Couple that with the fact that she doesn't like the final product and you can see how resentment will slowly build.

I suggest scrapping the idea that this hobby is something you two will enjoy together (that's perfectly OK) and instead try to think of another hobby you two can do together to balance things out a bit.
 
I'm surprised with the number of people suggesting easing her into it or trying to suggest different beers until she finds one she likes.

I think this comes from the fact that many of us that really love beer used to be like them, but we grew to love it. I wish we did keg stands with an IIPA instead of BMC light when I was in college. I would've appreciated beer at a much younger age.
 
I think this comes from the fact that many of us that really love beer used to be like them, but we grew to love it. I wish we did keg stands with an IIPA instead of BMC light when I was in college. I would've appreciated beer at a much younger age.

I have a different take on it. Most of us started drinking beer due to peer pressure and the fact that a man has to like beer otherwise he's not a man. I think I speak for most people that my first beer was BMC and it tasted like cold, sweet urine at the time. Due to peer pressure I kept drinking this nasty crap and eventually came around, but without the peer pressure there is no way I would have continued to drink it. I'm in my thirties and my generation had fathers that drank BMC exclusively, not craft beer. I think our children will be much better off because us fathers know what real beer should taste like.

Back to the point, she doesn't like beer and probably doesn't like feeling pressured because "it's not right that she doesn't like it" just like we faced as teenagers.

Then again maybe I'm way off base and I just need to leave work and have a beer or three.
 
I have a different take on it. Most of us started drinking beer due to peer pressure and the fact that a man has to like beer otherwise he's not a man.

I don't know about the "being a man" peer pressure. I love beer, and grew to appreciate it even more when I lived in Germany as a young adult. I never thought of beer as being a "man's drink" but I would agree that some women like sweeter drinks, like a semi-sweet white wine or fruity wines.

I am on the "people like what they like" bandwagon. I hate chocolate, and my spouse telling me that I just don't have a refined palate since I don't like chocolate won't ever make me like it.
 
The peer pressure thing doesn't fit for me. I didn't have a single drink until after I was 21. One day I grabbed a beer at a party and drank it simply because I wanted to know what it tasted like. It was some Sam Adams. I hated it.

Then I decided to have a Guinness a few days later. I loved it. Peer pressure had nothing to do with my taste for beer. I wasn't pressured into liking Guinness, I just liked it. Likewise, I wasn't pressured into disliking Sam Adams, I just didn't like it. This is one of the reasons why I don't think beer is necessarily an acquired taste - something a lot of people like to say.

Like Yooper said, you can't convince someone to like something. You can convince someone to eat/drink it anyway, but they still won't like it. I think giving someone space, though, makes it more likely for them to later approach you with an open mind. If this girl (or anyone) eventually wants to find a beer she likes, she'll initiate it herself. Until then, just chill out.
 
does she drink/ like coffee? if so have her try a coffee stout or a chocolate stout. i've had pretty good success introducing those styles to women. maybe try a nice porter. not every woman likes light fruity beers.

yeah i'm with this. just because she's a woman doesn't mean she has to like "lighter" beers or sugar.

my wife is pretty eclectic in her beer tastes (she doesn't drink much beer to begin with). She doesn't like hoppy beers, but she loved southern tier's barleywine. she doesn't drink coffee but loved my porter. she hated my low IBU ESB (I thought it was the best beer i've ever made) and she hates most "lighter" beers. i'm not sure if she's had a wheat....

try giving her a porter.
 
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