Dan

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Idiots all of you. I'm at the right place.

Talked to an old time brewer today. He said crocks are good for dryhopping and gators are best for first wort hops. He mentioned rabbits and hampsters as aroma hops only and strongly suggested against black widow spiders as yeast nutrient, he did however state brown recluses would add some destructive (he said this with a loving heart) spicy bitterness when added in the last minute of the boil.

Interesting thread. For my next brew I'll be adding elephant gonads that will have been poache at 126 degrees celcius in my subterranian mash tun.

It is claimed that this will add a gopher ass tinge and smoky barouqe flavor to hearty ales.

Obliviousbrew

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First of all Dan, you are in the rigth place, considering that your brewer never mentioned turtles and that you double post... yes we can consider you an idiot. The elephant gonads sounds disguntly interesting. Agreed on everything else about crocs gators but I am deeply shocked that turtles were not mentioned after all they did for us.

WesleyS

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Where were you before I brewed my idiotic black IPA? I think that's just the flavor it needs!

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static

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Brown recluse huh... This place is lousy with them. Time to clean out the wood pile.

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cheezydemon3

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Wives tales.....

Science has proven that gators release virtually no flavor at 60 or even 90 minutes as all of the flavor boils off and gators are surprisingly not bitter.

subterranian eh? That's original!

Still no word from the national Geographic crew that got lost in mine........

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justwhatthehellareYOUlookingat?

static

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I'm sure they will float to the surface eventually.

On a side note.. there is something odd and unsettling about your avatar....

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CreamyGoodness

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I have never brewed beer, but I would think that all of this is academic if you fail to properly sanitize your equiptment. Starsan isnt necessary since moose urine is sterile.

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You are more likely to have a threesome with members of the Japanese women's curling team whilst spinning a plate on your head than you are likely to screw up a batch of JAOM.

WesleyS

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I still prefer to boil it for a few hours. A nice long boil will caramelize and concentrate all that gamey, musty goodness that makes moose urine such an outstanding ingredient in beer. Then I just drink Starsan shots mixed with turtle brains at mash out.

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cheezydemon3

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.......never.....brewed.........wait, what?

I had my moose snipped, so now he is sterile too. Very versatile!

Yeah, they were in a boat. Not sure what happened there.

On a side note: Seen ugly americans? You are missing out on some GOOD nonsensical humor there!! Twayne is a demon and demons impale their mates on the "bone" while copulating. Sheer awesomeness. The "bone" grows out of his chest unbidden when he senses a female demon "in heat".

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justwhatthehellareYOUlookingat?

static

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Little PSA for you, Old potatos=Botulism as found out by some prisoners at the Utah State prison.

http://www.correctionsone.com/correctional-healthcare/articles/6008070-Feds-Old-potato-behind-Utah-prison-brew-botulism/

Maybe that's what happened to your NatGeo crew

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The yeast knows what it's doing.