Brain Patties
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On their anniversary, think Louis ever came into the bedchamber and told his wife "darling, you're about to get Pasteurized!" If I were him, I would say that up to 7 times a week.
There has GOT to be a dirty joke involving Supreme Court Justice Learned Hand. Just cant make it happen.
They are illegal in NYC, but I would like to have a pet skunk, descented of course. I would sit at the local bar drinking bloody maries petting the skunk in my lap and talking like Andy Warhol. "Another beverage? yeeeahhhh that would be greeeeaaat wouldnt it Cornelius?"
I love bleu cheese. Only issue I have is that if it ever went bad, I would have no way of knowing.
The ONLY time I allow myself to say anything remotely racist is when I watch the Westminster Dog Show. I like to talk with a ridiculous German accent when the German Shepherd comes out, an Arabic accent when the Afghan Hound, etc. My Irish Wolfhound offers to get a pint of ale for my wife... usually by this time she's had quite enough of the dog show.
About a year ago I saw a man in my neighborhood riding a unicycle and wearing a derby. I cant explain it, and I cant for the life of me explain why, but this made me very angry.
Why do we say "blow me" when we are angry with someone? Those people I have said this to would be wholly unwelcome... well you get the idea.
No one had any cute or non-annoying children until I turned 28 years old. Not sure how such a global change occured... it should be documented.
Has anyone here ever ordered the live lobster at a diner?
These are some of the thoughts that have kept my circle of close friends extremely small.
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You are more likely to have a threesome with members of the Japanese women's curling team whilst spinning a plate on your head than you are likely to screw up a batch of JAOM.
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