First of all, congrats on your baby boy. I liked your FG analogy
I have gotten lucky several times in not adding bottling yeast and still getting great carbonation. Several high gravity brews that sat in secondary for months.
I bottled a 12% barleywine in January though without adding any yeast. And that one did not carb after several months. I had to pop the caps, sprinkle in some dry yeast, and recap. Would have been easier to add 1/4 packet to the bottling bucket and call it good.
Primary #1: Ice Shanty Bock #2: Empty
Secondary #1: Berry Rhubarb Wine #2: Black Currant Wine #3: Empty
Kegged: Hidden Lake Nut Brown, Border Crossing Vienna
Bottles: 2H IPA III, Carmel Apple Cider, Spruced Winter Warmer, Surly Bender clone, Big 50 Barleywine, Framboise Lambic, Dark Belgian Strong, Russian Imperial Stout, Sparkling Elderflower Wine, Barolo Wine, On Deck: ??