All I do is the posts, and just so the disconnect slips nicely over the o-ring.
I used to use just a spray of StarSan (always have a spray bottle of that in my brewery) but sometimes the disconnect would come off really hard. Now I sparingly lube the o-rings, but still hit them with StarSan to sanitize.
I had the spray lube in the past, and I think I like the spray stuff better, it gives you the thin film you're after by default.
I don't feel that it helps it seal better myself, so I'd say skip it til nextime.