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10-24-2008, 02:26 PM
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#1
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In yo' garage, steelin' yo parts.
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This is when my job gets tough.
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Bible belt Oklahoma. Not much happens here that isn't caught by the religious radar.
I am a Plans Examiner (Code Monkey chained to a desk) for my city and was recently graced with an obscure application to review.
The applicant proposes to open a Men's only barbershop in central Okc. Said shop prposes to have a full bar and topless, yes that's right TOPLESS with bikini bottom barberess'.
On the surface this sounds like my kinda place, except that when I did have hair those who cut it weren't much to look at.
Unfortunately, this jurisdiction has so many regulations against bars and "Adult entertainment" that it'll be virtually impossible for anything like this to open and definitely impossible for them to open wher they propose.
They are proposing to locate themselves within 500 foot of a church, 1000 foot from a school and a public park. A restriction they will never get approved no matter how much money they throw at it.
Ah well. What can I do. I am just a monkey regurgitating rules from a book, right?
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10-24-2008, 02:32 PM
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#2
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It's their fault for putting it so close to those two spots. If they were smart they'd put it up in a warehouse somewhere and begin to rake in the money.
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Reklaw Brewing Studio
Philadelphia, PA
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10-24-2008, 02:34 PM
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#3
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Senior Member
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Make the sugguestions as to how they may get it passed. Tell them WHY they are being rejected....and how to get it approved.
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Seriously. I'm here for BEER
It's Not The Size Of Your Rig That Counts....It's How Often You Use It.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TxBrew
This forum is like America's money spread. 90% of the posts were created by 1% of the community.
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10-24-2008, 02:36 PM
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#4
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There was (and still might be) a bar in Tucson that was converted from a church. To keep within the "distance from" regulations, they actually walled off the corner that was too close to a school!
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Remember one unassailable statistic, as explained by the late, great George Carlin: "Just think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize half of them are even stupider!"
"I would like to die on Mars, just not on impact." Elon Musk
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10-24-2008, 03:12 PM
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#5
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Topless barber shop. Oh man that would be fun.
Honey, I need to go get my hair cut again!
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by the_bird
Well, if you *love* it.... again, note that my A.S.S. has five pounds.
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10-24-2008, 03:13 PM
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#6
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In yo' garage, steelin' yo parts.
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Yeah. I always do make suggestions as to how someone can get approved and we never flat deny an application. Typically, we cite the required corrections needed to allow approval and leave it to the applicant to comply.
Unfortunately, in cases like these the list become long and overwhelming to the point of being prohibitive. The reality of it is that people rarely come in ready to spend a fortune to comply with code and in this case, a bar/club going into an existing non-separated mixed use building (code speak) coupled with local amendments, the new owner would have to sprinkle and bring it to full compliance with accessibility standards. And that is only after they can get the concept compliant with our Zoning codes.
We have had some people propose to build barriers between districts to mitigate impact but, or Zoning department is very strict about the proximity regulation. And if nothing else, Oklahoma has got plenty of schools and churches.
Unfortunately, this one is just gonna go away. Oklahoma just isn't liberal enough for this sort of thing. (sigh)
It's so bad that recently I had an exiting strip club post fire abandonment have new owners and propose a remodel to repair and re-open. the previous owners weren't proactive and failed to comply with requirements that would have allowed it to be grandfathered into it's location. Now, it is being so regulated that the new Owners would be better off to sell it or turn it into a restaurant. Given it's location it wouldn't survive to be anything else.
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10-24-2008, 03:15 PM
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#7
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In yo' garage, steelin' yo parts.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ohiobrewtus
Topless barber shop. Oh man that would be fun.
Honey, I need to go get my hair cut again!
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With a full bar no less. And regulation pool tables to boot. Heck, I am bald and (provided the barberess' were decent) I'd even go in for the frequent trim up.
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10-24-2008, 03:19 PM
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#8
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Location: Gainesville, Virginia
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Last I looked - there is no law placing anything in particular near a church. Or for that matter any laws that prevent opening a bar or adult establishment anywhere near a school. If so, most cities in the US would be in trouble.
While it may not be popular, if you deny the application you are opening up the county for a reverse discriminatory lawsuit.
For example... I for one do not want churches anywhere near my schools as I believe it sets a bad example.
Besides, I have seen these places open before and they never last long. Too expensive for a haircut.
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- JVD_X
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10-24-2008, 03:26 PM
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#9
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Location: Bee Cave, Texas
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Ah, the old scalp needs another massage hon. Gotta keep the skin from flaking ya know. 
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10-24-2008, 03:27 PM
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#10
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In yo' garage, steelin' yo parts.
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Location: Oblivion
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JVD_X
Last I looked - there is no law placing anything in particular near a church. Or for that matter any laws that prevent opening a bar or adult establishment anywhere near a school. If so, most cities in the US would be in trouble.
While it may not be popular, if you deny the application you are opening up the county for a reverse discriminatory lawsuit.
For example... I for one do not want churches anywhere near my schools as I believe it sets a bad example.
Besides, I have seen these places open before and they never last long. Too expensive for a haircut.
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Different jurisdictiona have different rules.
Here, the Zoning code states that;
- No conditional use permit shall be granted for any proposed location which is within a 1000 foot radius of any other Adult Entertainment Use.
(Kinda kills the concept of the strip)
- No Adult Entertainment Use shall be allowed to locate within a 500 foot radius of any Church, public or private school, or public or private park. No Adult Entertainment Use shall be allowed to locate within a 500 foor radius of any residential district.
- (paraphrased) All dtstances are measured from the nearest 2 adjacent property lines.
Meaning, not even a oversized property gets them a benifit.
Like I said, Bible belt. And we rarely flat out deny an application but in this case the locations proximity won't allow the use unless it was grandfathered. And yeas again, it'd prolly make a ton of money for a little while and then fade away.
Last edited by GilaMinumBeer; 10-24-2008 at 03:30 PM.
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