Two Muffins In The Oven

Donasay · 01-17-2008, 04:05 PM

Two muffins are baking in the oven:

The first muffin turns to the second muffin and says, "Wow, it is getting really hot in here"

The second muffin looks over at the first muffin and says, "Holy ****! a talking muffin."

.

Professor Frink · 01-17-2008, 04:10 PM

Muffins are just gay donuts.

Evan! · 01-17-2008, 04:11 PM

aw, man...

cheezydemon · 01-17-2008, 04:14 PM

That is funny! I thought this thread would be about how your swmbo was having twins.

The Homeland defense is investigating a farmer who they think might be hiring illegal workers.

Defense dude: How many people work this farm?

Farmer: Welp, there is the guy I hired to help out. He gets $150 a week plus room and board. I issue him a check and take out taxes.

There is the woman I hired to help out. She works for $350 a week and lives elsewhere.

And Finally there is the Idiot that I give $10 a week to and buy him a bottle of tequila every Saturday night. He does 90% of the work, pays his own room and board, and occasionally sleeps with my wife.

Defense dude: That's him! the Idiot! We need to talk to him!

Farmer: Welp, you already are.

ohiobrewtus · 01-17-2008, 04:20 PM

Certinaly not what I was expecting either.

Chad · 01-17-2008, 04:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Professor Frink

Muffins are just gay donuts.

I believe you mean "alternative lifestyle" donuts.

Chad

**brauhaus** · 01-17-2008, 06:12 PM

A old man is sitting on his porch when a little boy walks by with Duct Tape, the old man says, "Hey son, where you going?"

The little boy looks up and says, "I'm going Duck Hunting."

The old man says, "How, you don't have a gun, or a net or anything?"

The little boy says back, "ah, I was playing around my dad's tool shed and found this Duck Tape and I'm going to catch me some Ducks!"

The old man looks at the boy in disbelief and thinks, WTF? but he decides to just ignore the foolish boy instead.

5 minutes later the Boy appear out of the woods with 2 Ducks under his arms, the old man falls out of his rocking chair and cannot believe it!

The next day, the old man sees the boy again and askes, "So what are you up to today?"

The little boy says, "I'm off to hunt for chickens!" and at this the old man replies, "How? you don't have a gun?"

The little boy pulls out some chicken wire and says, "well, I was playing around my dad's tool shed and found this chicken wire!"

The old man sits back for a second and then says to the boy, "What? the wire is what you use to keep the chickens from wandering off, not to catch them!"

the little boy shrugs and walks off...

10 minutes later the boy appears, 2 chickens tucked under his arms, the old man is completely blown away.

The next morning the old man is weeding his garden when he sees the little boy, he stops the little boy and says, "Where you off to today?"

The little boy pulls a Pu$$y-Willow branch from his pocket, at that very moment the old man stands straight up, throws down his garden tools and says, "Well, let's go hunting!"