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Old 07-11-2014, 11:02 PM   #1
markstache
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Default The things kids say

My son (age 3.5) is fire today.

First, he uses his magic wand to "turn daddy's beer into a flowers!" Yes, this saison does have a floral nose.

Later, he has his water bottle and is dancing around.
Boy: I like beer.
Mommy: What kind of beer? IPA? Saison?
Boy: ... Water beer!
Me: Oh, so you like Miller Lite?

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Old 07-12-2014, 05:25 PM   #2
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When I was about around 2, I saw a african american man with one leg in a grocery store, and ask him "Hey mister where is your other leg?" My dad says he would have ran out of the aisle except he was paralyzed from embarrassment. This was in the late 70's so dad assumed the man had lost it in Vietnam. The man turned and looked at me and said "well son my other leg went to heaven". I said "oh, ok" and on down the aisle I went.

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Old 07-13-2014, 09:34 AM   #3
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When my niece was about 4, we visited the nextdoor neighbors one day. She & the neighbor kid were playing in the living room when they had a disagreement about something. So the neighbor kid stomped off to his bedroom & closed the door, apparently to get away from my niece. She tried to continue playing in the living room by herself for a while, but it just wasn't as much fun as it was with a playmate. So she marches up to the bedroom door & yells at the kid "You better not be playing with yourself in there!" Obviously she had no idea how that sounded, she was only 4 after all; but me & my buddy (the other kids dad) just about spit our beer out laughing over that.
Regards, GF.

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Old 07-15-2014, 10:21 PM   #4
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When she was 5 my daughter told me " barbie is better than bratz because she has bigger boobs".

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Old 07-15-2014, 10:50 PM   #5
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Years ago when my son was about 4 our daycare lady managed to video him and his playmate having a conversation about willpower.

My son: "If they won't let you do the thing or have a thing just cry"
Girl: "Ohh no, that just makes them mad and they still say no"
My son: "Ohh well, my parents are easy. If they say no I just cry harder."

We still have that video. I'm sure my grandson/grandaughter will enjoy seeing this one day.

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