Electric Brewing Supply 30A BCS Giveaway!


Home Brew Forums > Home Brewing Community > General Chit Chat > Moral dilemma...about a dog (long post)
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 06-18-2010, 04:05 PM   #1
fezzman
HBT_SUPPORTER.png
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Recipes 
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Central Florida
Posts: 761
Liked 5 Times on 3 Posts

Default Moral dilemma...about a dog (long post)

My wife and I have two dogs of our own (white boxer/pointer and a black boxer/lab). I was never a 'dog person' until these two came into our lives. Now I guess you could say that helping dogs has become our calling.

The county shelter is around the corner from our house. It is a high kill shelter. People drop their animals at what they must think is the county pet shop when they have to move, didn't check with their landlord, puppy grew up, etc). Then you have asshole back yard breeders who drop off the puppies that don't fetch as much $$ from the litter. Now the former pets get put down to make room for the puppies. Though lately even the puppies are getting the axe. ...sorta

BACK ON TRACK: Earlier this year we would started fostering dogs. We would pick out a dog that was on "the list" and bring him/her home as a foster until a forever home is found. We find nothing more rewarding that getting a dog the day before it is scheduled to die and finding the proper home for it. We've saved 8 or so to date (lost a few to distemper).

We currently have a young male brindle Plott hound. He's a sweet dog but we need to watch him like a hawk because he wants to take ANYTHING outside to chew on (remote controls, shoes, candles, pillows, sheets). He even fit a broom through the dog door. He is also just a bit too rough with our cat for comfort.

Anyways, this Vietnam vet fell in love with him and has been approved to adopt him. We held the dog for two weeks waiting for him to get neutered, which finally happened yesterday. Last night we got an email from the guy who was now in the hospital. He is going into surgery and will be in the hospital for 30 days to have some kind of bypass done. He will then have extensive therapy. This is the second time he's been in the hospital since being approved for adoption.

He claims this dog reminds him of his old dog that he had for 15 years. That dog's urn is now on his mantle. From conversations and emails, it almost seems like the promise of this dog is helping him cope with his medical issues. That is where our moral issues come into play.

Even after recovery, this puppy may still be too much work for him to handle. We really don't want to hang onto this dog for that long. We've already turned down two other offers for him and really want to move onto helping the next dog.

I think we will suggest that we find Wingnut a new home and will keep an eye out for a similiar dog that will be slightly less of a handful. We've seen several already. He said he would understand if we can't keep Wingnut that long but that still leaves a feeling of guilt knowing how badly he wants this dog. Keep in mind that he has never physically even met this dog, only pictures and conversations with us. He lives pretty far away. Thoughts?

__________________
fezzman is offline
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 06-18-2010, 05:41 PM   #2
david_42
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
 
david_42's Avatar
Recipes 
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Willamina & Oak Grove, Oregon, USA
Posts: 25,654
Liked 135 Times on 128 Posts

Default

I think it's time for Wingnut to move on. There is absolutely no guaranty that the guy interested in him will be able to take possession and continuing to foster Wingnut is denying other dogs an opportunity for help. If the guy had met Wingnut, I'd feel a bit different.

The local greyhound group is getting 'clogged' up with fosters, because the placement people are seeking perfection (and routinely failing) in finding forever homes (as we call them). Bad for the fosters, bad for the dogs, bad for the people looking for companions.

__________________

Remember one unassailable statistic, as explained by the late, great George Carlin: "Just think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize half of them are even stupider!"

"I would like to die on Mars, just not on impact." Elon Musk


david_42 is offline
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 06-18-2010, 05:47 PM   #3
IrregularPulse
Hobby Collector
HBT_LIFETIMESUPPORTER.png
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
 
IrregularPulse's Avatar
Recipes 
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 43,154
Liked 2779 Times on 2727 Posts
Likes Given: 121

Default

I would continue to look for another home. If you find one before this guy is ready, then sorry. Another dog will be along for him. You're doing a great thing for these dogs and don't need to be taken advantage of by holding it for someone for who knows how long.

__________________
Tap Room Hobo

I should have stuck to four fingers in Vegas. :o - marubozo
IrregularPulse is offline
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 06-18-2010, 05:54 PM   #4
dleonard
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Recipes 
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Knoxville, TN
Posts: 111
Liked 3 Times on 3 Posts

Default

Well, IMHO...
I have a friend that’s a Vietnam Vet, and I always take my dog when I go see him because she does calm him, and he is in better mood when she's around.
But I also have neighbors that are a part of a dog rescue program, and am aware of the responsibilities there.
I think that you should keep the dog for now, and place him in a different home later. Placing a dog, and make no mistake you are choosing to put him there as opposed to giving him away, is all about the dog, not the future owners. If you're description is completely accurate, I don't see that dog making him happy. I know that my VV buddy doesn't get around well, and dealing with an avid chewer would just add frustration.
I think the best solution would be to find another dog, that fits his life style. While it might not have the exterior that he wants, a better fit on the interior is more important.
I hope this helps!

__________________
dleonard is offline
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 06-18-2010, 05:55 PM   #5
fezzman
HBT_SUPPORTER.png
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Recipes 
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Central Florida
Posts: 761
Liked 5 Times on 3 Posts

Default

Thanks for the input. Yeah, I think we will have to just find another home. Shame about the greyhound fosters. A co-worker is 'fostering' a dog from the shelter too. But she is so picky that she's not advertised it for fear of it going to a bad home. Meanwhile, other local shelter dogs are being PTS in droves. SWMBO had the misfortune of giving input on the selection yesterday...it was a bad day.

http://www.pitbull-chat.com/showthread.php?t=63699

Here's a link where she posted a few pics. Our other foster, Daisy, has just been approved for adoption. Yay!

Irregular, you play disc golf?

__________________
fezzman is offline
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 06-18-2010, 06:03 PM   #6
Laughing_Gnome_Invisible
HBT_SUPPORTER.png
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
 
Laughing_Gnome_Invisible's Avatar
Recipes 
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 12,111
Liked 530 Times on 403 Posts
Likes Given: 76

Default

I feel bad for the guy, but the dog may well be too much for him no matter how he feels about it. You are in the business of doing your best for the dogs. You will continue to do that, even when the hard decisions have to be made, I'm sure.

__________________
Laughing_Gnome_Invisible is offline
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 06-18-2010, 06:25 PM   #7
Beerrific
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
 
Beerrific's Avatar
Recipes 
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Georgia
Posts: 5,600
Liked 45 Times on 37 Posts
Likes Given: 9

Default

I agree that the dog needs to move on. I am sure there are other dogs that could use the spot in your home (which is great by the way, I hope we can do the same some day when we have more space). But, if it all possible, you might explain the situation to the new family and it might be possible that if the guy gets better, he could visit with the dog or something of that nature. I mean it may or may not work out but a few mentions might set things in motion.

__________________
Beerrific is offline
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 06-18-2010, 06:40 PM   #8
fezzman
HBT_SUPPORTER.png
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Recipes 
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Central Florida
Posts: 761
Liked 5 Times on 3 Posts

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Beerrific View Post
I agree that the dog needs to move on. I am sure there are other dogs that could use the spot in your home (which is great by the way, I hope we can do the same some day when we have more space). But, if it all possible, you might explain the situation to the new family and it might be possible that if the guy gets better, he could visit with the dog or something of that nature. I mean it may or may not work out but a few mentions might set things in motion.
Not a bad idea at all. One of the people originally interesed in the dog even lives fairly close to the vet.
__________________
fezzman is offline
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 06-18-2010, 06:45 PM   #9
Homercidal
Moderator
HBT_MODERATOR.png
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
 
Homercidal's Avatar
Recipes 
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Reed City, MI
Posts: 23,857
Liked 2251 Times on 1608 Posts
Likes Given: 1235

Default

Add my name to the list who thinks he should have to pass on this one. First, it will be a while before he could even think about taking care of him, and second, it sounds like that particular dog will be too much in the end anyway.

I'd be honest with him and let him know that for both their sakes, you decide to let someone else adopt him, but hopefully another, easier dog will show up when he is ready for it.

__________________
I see lonely ships upon the water. Better save the women and children first. Sail away with someone's daughter. Better save the women and children first.

Homer's Brew Log
Homercidal is online now
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 06-18-2010, 07:05 PM   #10
fezzman
HBT_SUPPORTER.png
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Recipes 
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Central Florida
Posts: 761
Liked 5 Times on 3 Posts

Default

Thanks for all of the replies everyone. It has helped to solidify my gut feeling. Now I'll compound the dilemma.

1. We have two foster dogs, Wingnut and Daisy
2. Vet wants Wingnut and gets accepted to foster but has medical issues.
3. Someone else calls about Wingnut but can't have him as an app was just filled out.
4. They meet Daisy instead and instantly like her. Daisy likes them and their hyper dog.
5. Daisy then met their grandson (who is 6) and barks like crazy at him. Obvious aversion.
6. Despite this, they want Daisy. They state that they will work with her and see if she can get over her fear of the kid.
7. We are uneasy about this and let the shelter know about our fears. Daisy is a good girl and we don't want to set her up to fail. It is the last thing her breed needs, irresponsibility leading to another bite.
8. The shelter approves their application anyways since the family said they were going to work with Daisy.

We are trying now to get them to have a visit with Wingnut, since that is the dog that they originally inquired about. They seemd ho-hum about it because they were already sold on Daisy. They still agreed to visit with him. *crossing fingers*

It sucks to do so much for proper placement but really have no part of the decision making process. I really liked everything about the people wanting to see Daisy, except for the kid which I have big fears about.

In all reality, I think Daisy is a better fit for the vet. But where he lives he cannot have a pit bull. Wingnut reminds him of his old pit but is actually labeled as a Plott. As a plus for the vet, the VA has approved to send whatever dog he gets through training for free.

Whew, what a sticky situation. We're going to have a bit of a chat with the shelter tonight to try to iron out these kinks. Never again will we have two fosters at once...this time was just a fluke.

__________________
fezzman is offline
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Reply



Quick Reply
Message:
Options
Thread Tools


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Serious MORAL dilemma isac777 General Beer Discussion 51 03-13-2010 02:54 PM
long time no post boiler up General Chit Chat 7 11-14-2008 02:01 PM
Moral dilemma... DubbelDach General Chit Chat 29 07-03-2008 10:53 PM
Moral Dilemma?............nah BleedsDogFish General Chit Chat 15 04-29-2008 02:40 PM
Moral dilemma--is it worth it? Whelk General Beer Discussion 7 06-19-2007 04:15 PM