Originally Posted by stevea1210
I think the group needs to decide how Laura would be involved. If any part of the decisions on which beer to brew (his favorite style / recipe / things he doesn't like) are going to involve her, I believe it absolutely needs to wait more than 24 hours after the tragedy. How long, I haven't a clue. Everyone handles losses differently.
If this is something that the group wishes to do in honor of him completely on its own, I think the time frame is more flexible.
You have to realize that Laura may never go back on here, And you may never have a way to reach her....Nor may she want to, although she did give her email address, so it's hard to know.
I have been a part of these things in the past where someone uses the person's account on a forum and announces the regular poster's demise (sometimes it has been a fake) but in all the times I have ever been involved in, after the initial post you rarely if ever hear from the person who posted the info again. They usually have much more pressing issue to deal with over the next few days/months, including grieving and usually internet friends were usually the last thing on the person's mind.
Unless that spouse person were active in the hobby or forum along with the bereaved, which I didn't get the impression she was, usually any tributes/threads people do, don't really get to the awareness of the person who posted....this wasn't her community, it was his, if she has a community, more than likely she will grieve with them.
The only caveat to this is that if any fellow hbters on here were actually close in real life to them that is....then of course they could communicate to her our intent, and she what her thoughts are....but if not, and I don't know if anyone here knew him or knows her in real life...whatever we do, we do for us.
I don't want to burst anyones bubbles, but as a minister who deals with grief and someone who has been an active internet/forum presence as a know clergyman, I have been involved with countless internet grieving and online community tributes, on forums, on myspace etc....and rarely does the gesture actually leave the online community and intersect with the family.
Part of that tends to be geographical distances, and part of that just happens to be a part of humanity/ both the comfortable annonymity of the web...and the grieving process....things coming from outside the grievers' "community" can either be a great solace or actually just lead to another layer of grief...
So I'm just saying, don't let Laura's involvement or lack of it hinder our desire to do what we feel is a fitting tribute ourselves.
Like my snazzy new avatar? Get Sons of Zymurgy swag, here, and brew with the best.
Revvy's one of the cool reverends. He has a Harley and a t-shirt that says on the back "If you can read this, the bitch was Raptured. - Madman
I gotta tell ya, just between us girls, that Revvy is HOT. Very tall, gorgeous grey hair and a terrific smile. He's very good looking in person, with a charismatic personality... he drives like a ****ing maniac! - YooperBrew