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Old 12-17-2012, 01:12 PM   #1
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Default First cat whizz, now this...

Well then. That was special.

As many of you know, I used to have a downstairs neighbor who had an illegal cat that sprayed all over and made the house smell like a fertilizer factory. When she got done bringing in illegal pets and having loud sex, she left to "drive cross country" leaving an empty hedgehog cage behind. Poor hedgehog.

We applauded when the new neighbor, a rather young gay man moved in. Instead of cat whizz, the house started to smell like fresh paint and freshly brewed coffee. Much better.

And then in the morning a few days ago the wife and I wake up to go to work. She leaves before and while I am brushing my teeth I hear. "Honey, can you come down here." Never good.

So I do, and his door is wide open. The carpet in the lobby area is thrown to one side in a big ball, and there are couch cushions everywhere. Out of curiosity, I peer into his apartment... there isnt a couch in there that corresponds to the cushions. Not sure where they came from, and more importantly, why. But, being middle class, we still have to go to work. We deadbolt our door and head out, hoping he hasnt died or gotten robbed.

Waiting for us when we get home? A ziplock bag full of chocolate chip cookies and a note. "Please accept these cookies as an apology for my horrendous, irresponsible behavior last night."


Now it all makes sense. Oh wait, no, still makes no sense.

Great cookies though. I guess we will forgive him...?... just wish I knew what we were forgiving him for.

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Old 12-17-2012, 01:17 PM   #2
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Sounds like he had ONE hell of a party

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Old 12-17-2012, 01:24 PM   #3
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I'm pretty sure you don't want to know what you are forgiving him for lol. Carpet pulled aside and a bunch of cushions on the ground sounds like a party you may not want to be in the middle of lol.

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Old 12-17-2012, 01:28 PM   #4
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At least he was considerate enough to make you cookies. With all the cat spray smell, ripping out the carpet was probably a good idea. Maybe he was just waiting until after the bukakke party for a major remodel.

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Old 12-17-2012, 02:31 PM   #5
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You should make him apologize for each and every offense. That way you can find out what happened. It SOUNDS like he was just taking out that nasty carpet.

Then again, it could be something you don't WANT to know about!

(Like a body waxing party...)

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Old 12-18-2012, 12:19 PM   #6
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Unroll the carpet & check for bloodstains.
You should mount a few cameras & mics around the outside (and inside) of your place; and start carrying one around with you, mabye a hidden cam/mic, just to record the weird, random $hit you encounter from day to day. You'd have to edit it down, but I think it would make for some entertaining stuff. You could at least post it on youtube. You could call it The Cream Of Reality TV.
Regards, GF.

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Old 12-18-2012, 02:50 PM   #7
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The cookies are poisoned.. Don't EAT! He wants your apartment!

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Old 12-18-2012, 04:50 PM   #8
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You did say he was gay, right?

Probably the best cookies you'll ever have.

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Old 12-18-2012, 04:56 PM   #9
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Those liver sausage parties have gone viral.

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Old 12-18-2012, 04:59 PM   #10
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Hey, my liver sausage thread was totally serious. No one is giving my liver sausage woes the gravity they deserve.


hmm... what would be the original gravity on a liver sausage...

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YES, WE HAVE TRIED OTHER YEASTS! USE BREAD YEAST FOR JAOM!

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