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Old 05-01-2012, 01:23 AM   #1
thisoneguy
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Default Mishandled bottles at checkout

Man, am I the only one who cringes when I check out at the bottle shop and watch the cashier mishandle my beer (singles, bombers, 4- or 6-packs)?

I had a pretty good score today, but I'm bummed... I have to wait until tomorrow to try any of it so the yeast can settle back out after the cashier was so NOT careful with my bottles.

Silver lining: tomorrow I get to try Maharaja for the first time. I hope it's as good as I've heard.

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Old 05-01-2012, 01:43 AM   #2
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You know, back in the day I worked as a checker in a grocery store. Well, there was this one lady who would come through and buy 30 or 40 apples at a time and ask "don't bounce the apples" of the checker and the bagger. She was terrified that they would get bruised from being placed on the scale or on the conveyor belt. But she would cram that cartfull of apples in one or two plastic produce bags. You couldn't even pick one bag up to put them on the scale with all of the apples wobbling around, so you had to cradle that bag like a damn newborn, gently picking it up to weigh them, making sure those stupid apples wouldn't slide around and risk one getting bruised when you put them on the scale.

One time I weighed her apples and passed them back to the bagger, and the lady saw a little shake as the bag of apples went into the bag. Bitch freaked, screaming "I SAID DON'T BOUNCE THE APPLES" before launching into this tirade about what sort of idiots worked at the grocery store. I felt so bad for that bagger. I mean, we were High School students working for like $5 an hour taking crap from the sort of people who were too dumb to put their freaking precious apples in the bag three or four at a time.

So screw you and your "oh, they don't treat my beer bottles right" attitude. You want to be such a snob that your bottles have to be cradled across the scanner with velvet gloved hands? Bring your own gloves and ring them up yourself. Then put them in your car and turn the engine on to drive home. See how that rouses the yeast. So you can't stand to get drunk on three bombers of "mishandled" beers the same day you bought them? Suck it up and wait. There's going to be another Saturday night coming around in a whole week.

Until then bake yourself a pie with your unbounced apples, you picky freak.

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Old 05-01-2012, 01:45 AM   #3
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Now that was funny. Best reply I have seen in a long time.

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Old 05-01-2012, 01:47 AM   #4
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Then put them in your car and turn the engine on to drive home. See how that rouses the yeast.
Good point.
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Old 05-01-2012, 01:53 AM   #5
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Sandy, meet Sandy.

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Old 05-01-2012, 01:53 AM   #6
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Originally Posted by mojo_wire View Post
You know, back in the day I worked as a checker in a grocery store. Well, there was this one lady who would come through and buy 30 or 40 apples at a time and ask "don't bounce the apples" of the checker and the bagger. She was terrified that they would get bruised from being placed on the scale or on the conveyor belt. But she would cram that cartfull of apples in one or two plastic produce bags. You couldn't even pick one bag up to put them on the scale with all of the apples wobbling around, so you had to cradle that bag like a damn newborn, gently picking it up to weigh them, making sure those stupid apples wouldn't slide around and risk one getting bruised when you put them on the scale.

One time I weighed her apples and passed them back to the bagger, and the lady saw a little shake as the bag of apples went into the bag. Bitch freaked, screaming "I SAID DON'T BOUNCE THE APPLES" before launching into this tirade about what sort of idiots worked at the grocery store. I felt so bad for that bagger. I mean, we were High School students working for like $5 an hour taking crap from the sort of people who were too dumb to put their freaking precious apples in the bag three or four at a time.

So screw you and your "oh, they don't treat my beer bottles right" attitude. You want to be such a snob that your bottles have to be cradled across the scanner with velvet gloved hands? Bring your own gloves and ring them up yourself. Then put them in your car and turn the engine on to drive home. See how that rouses the yeast. So you can't stand to get drunk on three bombers of "mishandled" beers the same day you bought them? Suck it up and wait. There's going to be another Saturday night coming around in a whole week.

Until then bake yourself a pie with your unbounced apples, you picky freak.

Wow.

Having worked in the service industry and retail for a number of years, I would never DREAM of being rude to a cashier or other person helping me out for something as trivial as this. I certainly didn't say anything to the person... You might be happy to know that I kept my mouth shut and just wished to myself - silently - that the person didn't turn my beer literally upside down to scan it.

Sorry you had a bad experience with one douchebag old lady a long time ago. Don't take it out on me.
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Old 05-01-2012, 01:54 AM   #7
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You want to be such a snob that your bottles have to be cradled across the scanner with velvet gloved hands?

Until then bake yourself a pie with your unbounced apples, you picky freak.
this made my night...retail is the worst career in the world and this reminds me why.
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Old 05-01-2012, 02:00 AM   #8
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I will not say you are the only one, but I would think you are in the minority.

How do you keep the yeast from getting disturbed on the ride home, or in the cart before checking out, or by the guy that looked at the bottle 30 minuted before you did?

The only time I would cringe about the handling at the bottle shop is if there was a chance they could break the bottles putting them in a bag.

Don't sweat it.

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Old 05-01-2012, 02:01 AM   #9
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Wow.

Having worked in the service industry and retail for a number of years, I would never DREAM of being rude to a cashier or other person helping me out for something as trivial as this. I certainly didn't say anything to the person... You might be happy to know that I kept my mouth shut and just wished to myself - silently - that the person didn't turn my beer literally upside down to scan it.

Sorry you had a bad experience with one douchebag old lady a long time ago. Don't take it out on me.
Totally written for the humor. No anger at all behind it. Just thought it would be funny.

But the apples story is true. Still can't believe the gall of that woman.
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Old 05-01-2012, 02:28 AM   #10
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I worked at a grocery store in high school too, I know exactly what you're saying.

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