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Old 12-19-2013, 03:58 AM   #1
Thirdthorpe
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Default Homebrew facepalms

So I'm a big believer in learning from mistakes, both your own and from others so I was thinking of starting a thread dedicated to the biggest dumbass moments we've each had while brewing with the idea of others learning from it and for a good chuckle.

I'll start: I just shoved too hard on the cap to my fermenter while trying to put on the airlock and now have a rubber stopper sitting in the bottom of my latest batch of mead.

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Old 12-19-2013, 05:12 AM   #2
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I've melted at least three plastic carboys by putting too hot wort into them.

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Old 12-19-2013, 05:19 AM   #3
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First time I brewed with a keggle, I filled it halfway with cold water to cool it off and start cleaning after the wort had been transferred, and then grabbed it to dump it out. I figured the cold water would have cooled the keggle off enough to be able to handle it, but wasn't thinking that none of that cold water touched the skirt, which is where I grabbed it.

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Old 12-19-2013, 05:38 AM   #4
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Left the ball valve open on a kettle while filling it in the kitchen.

Brewed an entire batch with a broken thermometer

Froze my hydrometer

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Old 12-19-2013, 06:21 AM   #5
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Thought I could dry out a sanitized glass carboy by balancing it upside down on the counter (at that point in my life I feared the foam). Knocked it over and it dominoed into my yeast starter and spilt it over my hot oven element. Just caught the carboy before it shattered. Had to used a smackpack of hef yeast I had kicking around in a pale ale.

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Old 12-19-2013, 06:49 AM   #6
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Brewed and drank--a lot--at the same time first time I ever brewed....called that one "Dropping the Bucket Belgian." Tasted like nanners. Oh and I got to deep clean the kitchen because wort is sticky as hell and my father in law and I spread it from one end to the other.

Brewed with a pump for the first time with no hop spider, clogged the pump and valves, and had to figure out how to get 10 gallons of wort into carboys at the end of a very long and frustrating brew day.

30° brew days turn into 10° brew days when one gets a late start or decides to brew on a whim and the sun goes down just in time for wort chilling and clean up. My patio became an ice skating rink and I was frozen to the bone, exhausted, and sore from head to toe.

Starter walked off the homemade stirplate and all over my fermentation fridge...no yeast, big mess, 2 hours to lhbs.

Left my bucket of unmilled grain unattended and uncovered for a minute. Discovered my 12 year old chocolate lab REALLY likes grain when I walked around the corner and scared the sh!t out of her because she was shoulder deep in the bucket...no idea how much she ate! I do not leave her unattended near my grain and can't measure grain without locking her up or giving her some "distraction grain" in her bowl. She's like a freakin goat!

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Old 12-19-2013, 12:55 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pelipen View Post
Left the ball valve open on a kettle while filling it in the kitchen.
Did the same thing except it was the spigot on my bottling bucket. Luckily I had a thick towel under it. I was well prepared for my own stupidity.
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Old 12-19-2013, 12:59 PM   #8
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Kegged up an apple cider. Tasted it after two weeks. Thought it needed some back sweetening...

Made some caramel and added it to some apple juice concentrate. Popped open fully carbed keg and dumped about a gallon of sugar water into the keg... Ended up with about 2 1/2 gallons of sticky cider all over the wood floor in the office area of my condo. Every towel in the place was used to soak that mess up...

And to make things worse... I used to add pixie sticks to mt dew in high school... so I KNEW the effect that adding sugar to carbed up beverages was...

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Old 12-19-2013, 01:06 PM   #9
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Removed a keggle mash tun right after doing a step on my burner and brought it inside to keep it warm. The valve was leaking a little so I put the keggle down on my carpet to grab a plastic bag to prevent the leak from staining the carpet. I picked the keggle up and the carpet came with it. I put the keggle down on the plastic bag and looked at the carpet to find a giant burned O where the keggle sat. Looked over and the plastic bag was melted to the bottom of the keggle. You should have put it on a wood board says SWMBO... "Thanks for the 20/20 hindsight."

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Old 12-19-2013, 01:08 PM   #10
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The post about the dog eating the grain made me laugh because I've got a boxer and I can just see his dumb ass hammering some grain.

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