Use half pale half wheat to make a 1.035ish beer. Let the mash sit overnight. The next morning, throw most of the acid malt in there and let it sit another 24 hours until it looks and smells vile. Then boil, using a minimal amount of hops.
Add the rest of the acid malt to the fermenter and get a lactic acid fermentation going before adding a clean ale yeast. Should get you close to a nice Berliner Weisse that way.
The Fiesty(sic) Goat Brewery est. 2007 & Clusterfuggle Experimental Ales est. 2009
Primary: Saison, Berliner Weisse, sLambic I, sLambic II, IPA, 70/-
Secondary: Orange Blossom Mead, Flanders Red I
Kegged: Fat Man Porter w/ 1469, Fat Man Porter w/ 005, Centennial Falcon w/ Conan, Centennial Falcon w/ Denny's, Barrel-aged Fat Man Porter, Belgian Dark Strong, Dark Mild